


Kiss Me, Touch Me, Forget Me

by jamesilver



Series: Drarry Trashy Tropes [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Coming Out, Cute, Fake Dating, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Forgotten Room, Happy Ending, Heartbreak, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Loss of Virginity, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Memory Alteration, Memory Loss, Mutual Pining, Nicknames, Sad Draco Malfoy, Sex, accidental magic, alternate universe fake dating, but i promise you this is angsty af, draco is a drama queen, fake dating au, guys i always like run out of ideas for tags, its from lucius, kind of, like y'all his childhood was really shitty, not smut but they do have sex, secret passageways, secret rooms, these two are idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:33:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23677714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamesilver/pseuds/jamesilver
Summary: "Harry, you're..." Draco said quietly. "You're quite close."Despite Draco being a mere few inches taller, Harry seemed to look down at him, this time something deeper was burning in there and it made Draco...Well, it was fucking hot, Draco would say that.And who could blame him? He wasn't going to join up with the girls who chased Potter down hallways, but he couldn't deny that Potter was hot."You know," Harry said, speaking low. "If we were actually dating, I'd have half a mind to teach you a thing or two about how to hold your tongue."Yes, Draco thought. Harry Potter was most definitely fucking hot."We should get going to class."Without warning, Harry grabbed him by the face and pulled him into a quick kiss."You're seriously still that thrown off guard?" Harry asked. "I thought I was giving you clues that I was going to kiss you. I thought we were building up to it. Merlin, Draco, how will people ever think we're dating if I can never properly kiss you?"
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley (side)
Series: Drarry Trashy Tropes [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1349764
Comments: 62
Kudos: 697





	Kiss Me, Touch Me, Forget Me

**Author's Note:**

> This is the third installment in "Drarry Trashy Tropes". If you like this take some time to read the other trashy aus and subscribe for anything that follows. Thank you!
> 
> __
> 
> RATING:::: The sex is not explicit smut, but they do have sex and we don't jump past it. It's a very brief scene so, basically, if you don't want to see sex, it's all good cause it's short and not super descriptive and if you did come here for sex, bro cmon I mean it's rated M not E lol. 
> 
> ::: PLEASE READ::: TRIGGER WARNING::: I'm putting a trigger warning here for a few things. Firstly, homophobia. Lucius is super homophobic and for a little while there's a bit of a soft closet going on w Narcissa even tho she's mostly supportive. Also, there is a TW for abuse. Harry describes his past in a canon-compliant manner, but Draco does not sugarcoat how Lucius treated him. There are references to Lucius hitting Draco with a cane and also cruicoing him. 
> 
> __
> 
> Clocking in at 26k words, this is officially my longest one-shot to date! Enjoy... ;)

Harry was sprinting through the halls, trying to hide from the four girls chasing him with love potions. What was his life? At this point? He thought he had faced fear when he walked into the Forbidden Forest knowing full well he was going to die but this? Oh, this was much worse. 

Turning a corner quickly, he opened a door and slammed it closed but quickly ducked into the alcove across from it and shut his eyes tight before casting a disillusionment charm and sighing in relief, leaning back against the wall. 

He heard the screams of the girls rush past him and through the door across the hall and he stood up, sighing again in his reprieve. Before he could uncast the charm, a voice in the alcove made him jump. 

"Can I help you, Potter?" 

"Fucking hell!" Harry exclaimed, turning to his right and seeing Draco Malfoy. Quickly, he disillusioned himself and turned to face Malfoy. "Look, I don't know if those girls are fully gone so I'm going to be staying here for a few minutes and since you aren't going to be giving me away, you're going to stay here with me, okay? So, yes, you can help me, actually." 

Malfoy smiled a little bit and it wasn't his usual sarcastic smirk. "For once, Potter, I actually can sympathize." 

"Really?" Harry raised an eyebrow. "Because I don't see girls chasing after you down corridors." 

"I mean about the pressure, you know? Like, this entire thing would end--or at least calm down--if you started actually dating someone. But then that just puts pressure on you to find a girlfriend and  _ that _ I can completely understand." 

Well, Harry figured since they were stuck here and he and Malfoy were having a rare moment where they didn't want to kill each other, he would ask. "How so?" 

Malfoy rubbed a hand across his face. "You would not believe the 'get a girlfriend' pressure I face from my parents. My father, mostly, of course. This whole 'procure an heir, take over the estate' kind of pressure. My mother not as much. I mean, of course, she also wants me to get married and have children and everything but she isn't as much concerned about the carrying on the bloodline thing because I think she's actually accepted that I'm gay and I don't think my father can actually consider that as a real possibility until I'm bringing a guy home to face him." 

For a moment, Harry was silent and he was completely oblivious to the different shades of red Malfoy was turning as he realized he just accidentally came out to Harry Potter. 

Then, it all dawned on Harry. "Malfoy, I think that's it! If I start dating a  _ guy _ then all these girls will think I'm gay and I'll be free! I don't even have to date him for a super long time. As long as it's out there and public, then everyone will just think I'm gay and even after I break up with the guy then all these girls will still think I'm gay. It's almost genius. There's just the whole problem of I don't want to use a guy like that, you know like that would be super rude." 

"Yes, Potter, that would," Malfoy agreed. 

"Hey," Harry said, nudging Malfoy with his arm. "I think we just agreed on something. Wow, I think this conversation is probably the best we have had to date. You sympathized with me and now you're agreeing with me. Why can't we be like this all the time?" 

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Because you're a git all the time," he said, but there was no malice in it. 

"Why are you hiding in here anyway?" 

This time, Malfoy avoided Harry's eyes. "I just come here to think sometimes. I did it a lot in sixth year so it just feels comfortable to me now. It's a very forgotten little alcove. The shadows are just right and no one ever sees you if they aren't paying attention. It might actually be enchanted, it works so well." 

"Mind if I ask what's got you thinking?" 

Malfoy's shoulders hitched just a little bit higher, indicating that he was uncomfortable, but he still kept talking. He clearly needed someone to listen and he was a little stuck here with Harry for the moment. "My father has arranged a meeting between me and this girl. Apparently he and her father have been discussing the unifying of our families through the two of us." 

"And what does your mum think?"

"She thinks I should keep an open mind about the whole thing." 

Harry raised an eyebrow. "I thought you said she was okay with you being gay." 

"I never said she's okay with it. I said that she accepted it. I think she's always known, really. Probably before I did. And I don't know if she really has any problems with me being gay, but I think it's more like she doesn't want me to face any sort of discrimination because of it. It's been fairly common throughout history with high-status Pureblood families to marry according to your status based on some sort of arranged marriage and then...essentially find love in infidelity." 

"So she wants you to keep being gay a secret." 

Malfoy nodded. "Exactly. She would rather I marry this girl and then sleep with some guy on the side. It's been so common in these kinds of marriages that it's almost expected for men to cheat on their wives in these relationships. And I hate that. I don't want to do that. I don't want to be that person. I would much rather marry someone I actually love and can be myself with and have a life with the person that I love and not have it be in secret." 

"Yeah, I get that. I think that's really important."

"But the problem is that that's never going to happen because my father is never going to stop trying to set these things up until  _ he  _ accepts that I'm gay. And, like I said, that's never going to happen until I bring some guy home and I don't see that happening because in order to get a boyfriend, I would sort of have to, you know, come out and that's terrifying and I'm already hated enough and I think I could and would come out if I had someone to do it for. Like, I need that sort of push because otherwise, I don't know how to say it. I mean, of course, you don't understand or anything, but it's like...you have to actually tell people. And if I was with someone, I wouldn't actually have to tell anyone. Does that make sense?" 

Harry nodded. "Completely. You know, I don't think I've ever understood you so well. I wish we could talk like this all the time. Turns out you're not so bad," Harry joked, nudging Malfoy again and this time, he saw a smile. 

Again, Harry leaned back against the wall, knowing that the coast was probably clear and they could probably leave, but part of him didn't want to. "So, I need a fake boyfriend, and you need a boyfriend. Productive conversation," Harry laughed and Malfoy laughed a little bit with him. 

Then, Harry jolted up. "Hey, wait. I need a boyfriend to get these girls off my back and you need a boyfriend to help you come out and to convince your dad you're gay. And what are the chances of both of us finding someone to help us out? Not super high, I don't think. And surely a lot of people are going to think that I'm faking it, but if it's someone that no one would expect me to date or would mistake as being just my friend, then it would be more believable, right? And, you're worried about people hating you even more, right?"

"What are you saying, Potter?" Malfoy asked tentatively, clearly understanding what Harry was trying to say. 

"I'm saying that the chances of people hating Harry Potter's boyfriend are probably fairly slim. That is, except all the girls that would want to kill you for taking me somehow." Harry lifted his palms. "What do you say?" 

"Potter, are you asking me to be your fake boyfriend?" 

"Yes, Malfoy, I am asking you to be my fake boyfriend. And," Harry pointed. "Another reason why I am a great candidate to be your fake boyfriend is that we all know I'm not too scared to face your father. And most guys probably would be, don't you think?" 

At this, Malfoy narrowed his eyes, looking up and down Harry, judging him. "You know we would have to make it believable right?" 

"Yeah, of course. Holding hands, kissing, walking each other to class, being seen together everywhere, I get it." 

"Yes, I mean, of course, all of that. But we would also have to call each other by our first names, Potter, you realize that? Also, there's no way Weasley would believe it." 

"I'm sure if I kiss you in front of him, he'll have no choice. Look, we won't start this right away. That would be too obvious. We have to build up to it so it seems like a natural relationship pace, yeah?" 

Malfoy nodded. "Okay. When do you want to start all of this?"

Harry thought for a moment. "How about next week? Wait, was that a yes?" 

Pushing off of the wall, Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Potter, if we're going to do this, you're going to have to stop being so oblivious. I can't date a man like that." Then, he started to walk away. 

"Meet me back here tomorrow," Harry called. 

In response, Malfoy just lifted a hand over his shoulder before disappearing around the corner. 

Once Malfoy had left, Harry nodded to himself a few times. He could do this. He just had to make it believable. 

He turned and headed back to the common room. 

Once inside, he found his friends sitting together. Hermione was reading a book and Ron was playing a game of exploding snap with Dean, Seamus, and Neville. Harry looked at them and wondered if he should say anything now. Like outright say to them that he might like men or that he might like Draco or...something of the sort. 

Then again, it wasn't like he was a very good liar. Maybe he should leave that part to Malfoy. 

Harry stopped himself. Draco. He should leave the lying to Draco. 

"Hey, guys," Harry said, sitting down next to Hermione. 

"Hey, Harry," Hermione said, glancing up at him. "Why do you look weird?" 

For a moment, Harry panicked. Maybe he would have to do some of the lying after all. Well, he supposed he should just stick as close to the truth as possible. "I was, uh, running from some girls, as per usual, and then I was hiding from them and while I was hiding I happened to run into someone and...um...well, I might have a date tomorrow night." 

At once, all of his friends turned to look at him. And Harry knew they were going to ask, but he really wished they wouldn't. 

Ron opened his mouth anyway, oblivious to Harry's mental pleading. "With who?" 

Harry made a face. "I'd rather not say. At least, for now. We all know I'm not the best on dates and I'd rather wait to tell people until, you know, things are going some sort of smoothly." 

Neville shrugged. "Fair enough." 

"Not 'fair enough,'" Seamus protested. "Girls have been crawling over you ever since we got back. You finally say yes to one and then won't even tell us who it is? Come on, Harry, we've got to know!" 

"I for one," Hermione said, sitting up straighter. "Respect Harry's privacy." 

"Thank you, Hermione," Harry said. 

Ron narrowed his eyes at his best friend. "I get that you don't want everyone to know and you don't want the word to get out and everything...but you're gonna tell me, right? Cmon, I'm your best mate." 

Harry cursed himself for a moment. Mal--Draco was going to kill him. "Ron..." Harry started. 

He almost couldn't stand the look on Ron's face when he had started speaking. He looked so betrayed and hurt. "Not even me?" 

"You'll be the first to know," Harry rushed out. "I just...I don't know if I even really like this person yet. Okay, actually," Harry laughed a little bit. "That's not true. I do know. I don't know if this person really likes me. They never exactly joined in the crowd of girls running to chase me down or anything. And I think if I tell people, then I'm just going to think about it more and worry about it more and then I'll be more likely to fuck it up. And I don't want to. Like, really, don't." 

Now that Harry was doing it, he wondered how lying had never been this easy before. It all came so easily to him, as if he actually had feelings for Malfoy. Er, Draco. 

"I just," Harry said. "I don't want to talk about it until things either completely break off or turn into something real."

Neville nodded. "Right, Harry. Okay, back to the game." 

"Thanks, Nev." 

The next day, Harry tried not to stare at Draco all day, but he suspected that he wasn't doing so well. It was only breakfast and Harry felt like he had to stare intensely at his plate in order to resist just looking up and across at the Slytherin table where Malfoy was sitting and eating with his friends. Harry should have sat on the other side of the Gryffindor table where he would have to turn his head around to see Malfoy. Maybe that would have encouraged him to keep his eyes where they're supposed to be. 

"Harry," Ron said, breaking his attention away from--once more--Draco. 

"What are you staring at Malfoy for?" Ron asked. 

Shit. Already caught in the act. Harry knew he was starting to blush and had to do something to hide it. And quickly. 

"Uh," he began. 

Hermione unknowingly came to his rescue. "Harry, I swear. I know it's difficult to break old habits, but Malfoy is working on becoming a better person. He's not up to anything evil."

Harry nodded, attempting to look chastened. "You're right, Hermione. I should...be better." 

"Yes, you should. It's part of your healing process, too, you know. You've got to learn to not assume the worst in people." 

And just like that, Harry was freed from all suspicion. 

That was, until class. 

Once he got into potions class, he was seated only two spots away from Draco and Harry knew he was constantly sneaking glances over at Malfoy, but he just couldn't help himself. He was going to be fake-dating the man officially in about a week. He was going to be in this same seat, making faces at him and he was going to be walking him to class, hand in hand, and kissing him. 

And the real reason he kept looking at Draco was because he kept trying to catch  _ Draco _ looking at  _ him _ . How could he sit there and not be thinking about the same things? It just didn't make any sense. Harry wasn't able to catch Draco's eye once the entire day. 

Finally, Draco was walking toward the alcove where Harry was waiting and it was like Harry could sigh with relief that he actually existed to Malfoy once again. 

"Potter," Malfoy said. 

Harry cleared his throat, giving him a pointed look. "Draco," he addressed his soon-to-be boyfriend politely. 

Malfoy rolled his eyes. "Harry." 

Now that that was past, Harry looked around awkwardly. He didn't really know where to begin. 

"Did you tell your friends anything?" Draco asked. 

"Just that I have a date tonight. Didn't say who."

"Well, would you like to tell me why you've been staring at me all day?"

Harry glared. "Because I was infuriated by the fact that you hadn't looked at me once!" 

Draco rolled his eyes. "You're so sensitive, Potter." The two trailed off, looking around awkwardly, not sure where they were supposed to go from here. Their banter and insults were their comfort zone, but they knew insults wouldn't make for a convincing relationship. 

"So," Harry began. "What did you...have in mind?" 

Taking a deep breath, Draco looked as if he was gathering his courage. "I was thinking we should probably use this time to get to know one another so we know things about each other an actual couple would and then..." He paused, clearing his throat. "Well, we've already discussed how there will be certain things we have to do in order to present as a couple and we probably shouldn't do them for the very first time in front of a lot of people because then they would look awkward and..." He trailed off.

"And like we had never done them before. You're right." 

They both, however, continued to awkwardly stand there. Not exactly enemies any longer, but still not comfortable being around each other, they were at a weird place in their relationship. And they were about to make it even weirder. But neither suggested they call it off. 

Eventually, it began to take on a feeling of chicken. Like they were both silently daring the other to make the first move. 

After neither of them being able to think of anything to say, Harry rolled his eyes and stepped forward, closing the distance between them with three quick steps, and took Draco's face in his hands and pulled him in for a kiss. 

It was quick and Draco didn't really unfreeze from shock enough to really kiss back, but it was still a kiss. Harry pulled back, clearing his throat and dropping his hands. 

"There. Now we got the most awkward part out of the way." 

Draco wasn't able to say anything, eyes a little wider than normal and looking slightly panicked. 

"Well, okay," Harry admitted. "That was actually a really awkward kiss. D'you think we should maybe try again?" 

For a moment, it looked like Draco's panic increased more. Then, like a snap of the fingers, it all went away and was replaced with his perfectly schooled expression. "I don't think that will be necessary, no. I'm not really into public displays of affection so I think we could get away with not really doing that."

"But we are going to have to kiss again at some point. Some people just won't be convinced otherwise." 

Draco rolled his eyes, seeming to relax. "I think us just not hexing each other will be enough to convince most people." 

Harry laughed. "Yeah, you're probably right. But, still. Even though you aren't into public displays of affection, everyone knows from my previous relationships, that I am. And it'll look really weird if we're never seen making physical contact with each other. Maybe we should..." Harry glanced down at the minimal space between them. Slowly, he reached out his hand towards Draco's. "Maybe we should get comfortable with that? With touching each other?" 

Draco inhaled sharply when Harry took his hand. Then, he looked as if he relaxed. Well, at least, Harry thought that is how Draco would look to any passerby. But he could see that while Draco knew to release the tension in his shoulders to appear relaxed, he was never able to hide it from behind his eyes. 

"So," Harry started. "You say we should get to know each other." He pulled Draco to the wall and then sat down, tugging on Draco's hand to sit next to him. "What do you want to know?" 

Pushing his hair out of his eyes, Draco sat. "Now that I think about it, I actually know quite a bit about you. I know what NEWTs you're taking, I know what you got on your OWLs--"

"You do?"

"Yes, Potter. I know quite a bit about your life, considering that we've lived in rather close quarters over the past six-ish years. And outside of that, I don't think either of us particularly wants to talk about the war." 

Harry shivered. "Not at all." 

"All that's really left is...Your childhood, I guess." 

Well, Harry didn't like that question. "I don't really talk about before Hogwarts. Obviously, I'm an orphan. I grew up living with my muggle aunt and uncle and cousin." Harry laid his back against the wall, suddenly glad that he was holding Draco's hand. "It wasn't...the greatest." He took a deep breath, wondering what all he should share. 

"I didn't...have a room. They made me sleep in the cupboard under the stairs. I did all the household chores and cooking. Never had my own clothes, just things my cousin didn't want to wear anymore. I was always getting in trouble because of what I now know was accidental magic. Everything changed when Hagrid showed up and told me I'm a wizard. That basically sums it up." 

Draco's mouth fell open softly and he looked like he wasn't sure where to begin. "Harry, I'm so sorry." 

Feeling his skin crawl, Harry shrugged. "It's alright. I made it to Hogwarts and now I don't have to ever see them again." 

"Well, if you ever want me to ruin their lives, say the word. It would be a mistake to assume a Malfoy's influence is exercised only in the wizarding world." 

Harry laughed a little bit, understanding this was Draco's way of being a friend. That it was about protecting people. 

"Did your aunt and uncle not know you were a wizard? I mean, surely when your mother went to Hogwarts.... How did you not know?" 

"They knew," Harry said. "They just never told me." 

"But your parents died in a magical murder."

Harry shrugged. "They told me it was a car crash."

" _ Car crash? _ What about your avada scar?" 

"My what?" Harry looked at him strangely. 

Draco pointed at Harry's forehead. 

"The lightning bolt?" Harry asked, reaching up inadvertently to touch it.

For a moment, Draco pinched the bridge of his nose. "It's not a lightning bolt, Harry. That's the wand movement for the Killing Curse." 

Harry gave a light gasp. "No way!" 

"You never realized that?"

"Clearly not!" Harry recovered from his shock. That was an interesting fact. And here he had grown up thinking it was a lightning bolt. He had used the Killing Curse. How had he not figured it out? "Anyway, my aunt and uncle told me the scar came from the car crash as well. Broken glass and all that." Harry cleared his throat. "Any more questions about that?"

Draco went quiet. "I won't pry."

Harry gave him a small smile. "Thank you." They sat in silence for a moment, just holding hands. "Alright, your turn. Tell me about your childhood." 

He turned to Draco and smiled, ready to listen, but Draco was still quiet. He nudged him with his elbow and Draco looked up. 

"Why have we been fighting all these years? We're far more alike than we ever realized." 

"What do you mean?" Harry asked.

Draco took a deep breath, clearly preparing himself. "Everyone thinks I must have had such a great childhood. I don't know why people think that; must be the money my family has. And for the most part, it was good. I could go anywhere in the Manor or the grounds except my father's study. I had a tutor that came six times a week. I learned French and magic and math and history. And outside of the tutor, I spent my time in my imagination. Didn't really have any friends. 

"Of course, I was 'friends' with the children of my parents' friends and would see them whenever our parents got together. It's how I came into Hogwarts knowing Greg and Vincent, Pansy and Theo. But we never got to spend much time together as kids. So I was...lonely a lot. And then when I came to Hogwarts, I didn't actually know how to  _ make _ friends. Hence, that disaster with you that first day." They both laughed a little, remembering. 

"I wish I could say that was it," Draco continued. "That my childhood wasn't perfect because I was lonely. But my father..." Draco's hands twitched and he pulled away from Harry's grasp to pick at hangnails. "My earliest memory was from when I was probably three. I...went into my father's study. Stupid, really, I knew better. He hit me four times with his cane before my mother came in and stopped him. 

"As I grew older, I got smarter at avoiding my father when he was in his bad moods. I ended up finding all these secret passageways within the Manor, but they usually contained some sort of Dark Magic artifact that you would accidentally touch or look at and then your fingers would start decaying as if they were dead or something. 

"By the time I was eight, my father was starting to get increasingly frustrated with the logistics of returning the Dark Lord back to his full glory and I was upgraded from his cane to a cruciatus. Which was far more difficult to avoid. The cane, I could duck around. Might even be able to take it from him if I wanted to be bold. It only had a certain range and as long as I was outside of that, I was safe. But, the cruciatus, not so much. 

"My mother wasn't really able to do much. She stopped what she could. They fought about it a lot. To my knowledge, he never hurt her. Not physically at least, although I suppose it was possible. Don't know why he did with me. And then the rest you're already privy to, what with stalking me and all." Draco smiled, clearly trying to lighten the mood. 

Harry stared at him for a moment, suddenly able to see Draco in a completely different way. And he was right: they were far more alike than they had ever known. 

Unable to stop himself, Harry reached forward and pulled Draco into a hug. At first, Draco tried to resist, but eventually let himself be held. They spent a good while there before Harry pulled back, returning their physical contact to a simple hand-holding. 

Not saying anything, the two simply sat there for a while. Neither knew how long, but Harry's eyes were starting to close when Draco nudged him. 

"We should probably go," Draco whispered. 

Harry nodded. "Yeah. I'll, uh...See you tomorrow?" 

Nodding, Draco gave him a small smile. "Yeah. I'll see you then." 

Just before they went to stand, Harry quickly leaned in and gave Draco a slow kiss. This time, Draco was less shocked and shifted to turn more towards Harry, his other hand coming up to the side of Harry's neck as he kissed him back. 

Draco pulled back. "What was that for?"

"I figured if I keep catching you off-guard and you can hide your shock from that, kissing me when you're expecting it is going to be a breeze." 

Draco laughed a little bit, standing up. "See you tomorrow, Potter." 

"Bye," was all Harry said as he watched him walk down the hall. 

__________

Of course, Harry's friends would not stop with the questions. Ron, especially. 

"I'm just saying, if you're going to tell anyone, why wouldn't it be me? I'm your  _ best mate _ . You can always tell me anything, Harry." 

They were walking towards the Great Hall and Harry stopped, turning. He put a hand on Ron's shoulder. "I know I can tell you anything. But I can also tell you nothing." He dropped his hand and resumed walking. "Like I said, I don't want to say anything to anyone; I don't want to fuck it up. It's only been a week." 

Harry wasn't sure if he should start dropping hints yet. He and Draco were supposed to go forward with everything in another week. At what point in a normal relationship would he actually start telling his friends?

Honestly, Harry was so inexperienced in the whole matter that he didn't even know. 

The school, however, was fully aware that something was going on and Harry could swear there were likely bets being placed on who it was. Girls of all sorts were loudly proclaiming it was them and a lot of them had upgraded from chasing him down hallways to grabbing him in front of others--one even tried to kiss him--just to prove that they were the one that Harry Potter had chosen and that everyone else should just stop trying. 

Of course, those outside of Harry's immediate circle that had no interest in dating him were convinced it was all just a ploy. 

Well, Harry supposed, it technically was. Just not in the way that they thought. And he was sure that when it came out that he was dating Draco Malfoy, people would be sure he wasn't lying because how could they be lying about that? If they weren't hexing each others' faces off, it had to be genuine. 

Speaking of, Harry was thinking Ron was starting to notice. 

They sat down in the Great Hall and Harry couldn't help but sneak a couple glances Malfoy's way. It was a smart idea, probably, because if people noticed they would assume now that it was just like all those times in previous years. But, when they went public in a week, it would suddenly make a lot of sense to people. 

Maybe Malfoy wasn't the only one in this relationship that could fake things well. 

And now that Harry was starting to stare at Draco for some reason other than thinking he might be evil, Harry was starting to notice a lot about him. 

For example, his hair  _ really was _ that blonde. 

Ron nudged his arm, pulling his brain back to their table. "Mate, why are you starting at Malfoy? What's he done?" 

Harry shot him a bit of a glare. "Why'd you assume he's done something?" 

At that, Harry knew he had clearly made a wrong move. Multiple people at the table who were within earshot stopped what they were doing, what they were saying, and turned to look at Harry. 

In his panic, his eyes glanced towards Draco only to see him staring back. And looking a little worried. 

Deciding to do what he always did best, Harry panicked out a, "I have to go," and stood up from the table, bolting out of the Great Hall. He hoped that his friends wouldn't notice Draco following him. 

Draco caught up to him minutes later in their normal spot. "Potter, we haven't gone public yet so you're going to have to be a little more subtle. I know it's asking a lot of you, but--"

"You know you're not very good at following your own rules, Draco." 

When he just got a confused look in response, Harry continued. "You said you wouldn't date someone--fake or not--that didn't call you by your name and you seem to be calling me Potter quite a bit."

Draco scoffed, tossing his hair with a flick of his head. "I only do it when you're being an idiot. I mean, think about it, wouldn't it be natural to our friends and the population of Hogwarts at large if we occasionally threw those in as cute, teasing jabs. In a way, they're kind of a pet name." 

Harry stepped closer to Draco and nearly jumped when he realized his brain was starting to note what Draco smelled like. This fake-dating stuff was really going to mess with his head, wasn't it? "You're always so good at talking your way out of things. Probably your best talent, actually." He paused for a moment, before talking at random because he didn't want Draco to jump in and say something first. 

"I'm actually kind of questioning our timeline a little bit. I don't know if I want to wait another week. It's getting really obvious, my friends won't stop pestering me, and these girls are getting damn  _ worse. _ " 

"I've realized. Look, just try to hang in there, okay, Potter?" 

Harry pointed at him. "See, you did it again! And it wasn't because I was being an idiot this time, was it? It's a habit and you're not doing too good to break out of it. Isn't that what this time is for? For us to get into the grooves and rhythms that dating people experience?" 

After staring at him for a moment, Draco rolled his eyes. "You're right, when you're doing something stupid, I can always just resort to the classic 'Scarhead' and when you're being a general ass, I'll just call you 'Golden Boy' or 'The Chosen One' sarcastically. Isn't that right, oh great prophesied, Boy Who Lived Twice?" 

Beginning to get a little fed up with Malfoy's shit, Harry crossed his arms over his chest. "You're insufferable," he said. "And I don't find you funny." 

"What are you gonna do,  _ Potter _ , hex me over it? Don't sabotage this relationship before it's begun." 

Harry moved closer, backing Draco against the wall. "What am I supposed to do when you're like this in public? Because I'm assuming there's no way in hell that you're going to turn it down any and act like a normal person."

"I would never," Draco said. "I don't think I should be someone easy to date. I'm a prize to be earned; you have to show me that you're worthy." 

"I'd expect nothing less." 

"Harry, you're..." Draco said quietly. He was pressed against the wall and Harry was inches from him. He could feel Harry's breath on his face and it was like Harry didn't even notice. "You're quite close." 

Despite Draco being a mere few inches taller, Harry seemed to look down at him. But not in a condescending way, Draco noted. It was in the way that Harry had always looked at him except with one slight difference: whereas it had usually been with anger or some form of hatred, this time something deeper was burning in there and it made Draco...

Well, it was fucking hot, Draco would say that. 

And who could blame him? He wasn't going to join up with the girls who chased Potter down hallways, but he couldn't deny that Potter was  _ hot _ .

"You know," Harry said, speaking low. "If we were actually dating, I'd have half a mind to teach you a thing or two about how to hold your tongue." 

Yes, Draco thought. Harry Potter was most definitely fucking hot. His brain stuttered around for something to say. He was usually so quick with retorts when it came to Potter but this close proximity was beginning to make him wonder if this whole arrangement wasn't actually the greatest idea. He knew Potter was straight, which meant he knew that this really was all fake and that he would have to let Potter go. 

Which was fine. He could totally do that. Because at the end of the day, through all the faking and the fact that Potter was incredibly attractive, something deep inside of him still hated Potter. And he was sure something deep inside of Potter still hated him. 

"We should get going to class," was all Draco was able to come up with. 

Without warning, Harry grabbed him by the face and pulled him into a kiss. It was quick and Draco wasn't able to react or catch up before it was done. 

"You're seriously still that thrown off guard?" Harry asked. "I thought I was giving you clues that I was going to kiss you. I thought we were building up to it. Merlin, Draco, how will people ever think we're dating if I can never properly kiss you?" 

Draco just blinked, still reeling. Then, he shook his head. "Right, I'll work on it. See you after class." 

"Yeah," Harry said. "Be seeing you." 

__________

Over the course of the following week, Harry tried to not appear as obsessed with Draco as he actually was. And he was starting to think that it was working...until he got confronted about it. 

He and Ron were sitting outside on the lawn, "studying" while Hermione poured over the books in front of them. Eventually, Hermione picked up a textbook and started walking around with it, an indicator that she had encountered some sort of problem she was working through--likely with the information in the textbook being inaccurate--and the two friends were left in silence for a few short moments before Ron couldn't handle it anymore. 

"Okay, look, Harry--"

"I'm not going to tell you who it is." 

Ron pressed on. "Something's going on between you and Malfoy." 

Surprised, Harry turned towards Ron a bit. That wasn't where he had been expecting this conversation to go. He had naturally assumed that Ron was going to continue to question him about whoever he was dating. Harry's mind, of course, did not make the obvious connection between these two things at this moment. 

"And," Ron continued. "Don't deny it. I know something is going on between you and Malfoy. You two keep exchanging all these looks in the Great Hall and then you'll run out and less than a minute later, he's leaving. I've seen you ducking off to different corridors together. You're staring at him now more than you did sixth year. Harry, you..." Ron paused, picking at the grass for a moment. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" 

Still not catching on, Harry was starting to get a little upset. "Why'd you assume he's up to something? The war's over, Ron; this is nothing like sixth year."

Ron held Harry's stare a moment. "No, I don't suppose it is. And I don't assume he's up to something. Want to tell me why you're so desperate to defend him?"

Now, Harry was starting to scramble. "It's not that I'm defending him, it's--it--" He huffed a moment, aware that he was huffing and wanting to stop it somehow. "It's the principle of the thing," he said, his brain suddenly supplying him with some very Hermione-esque words. 

"Or, Harry, there's a much simpler explanation." 

The two friends looked at each other, Harry defiant, Ron with his eyebrows raised. 

"I don't know what you're talking about," Harry said. 

Ron gave a sigh. "So, Harry, to be clear: you have a secret about someone that you're dating. You don't want to tell anyone who it is, even your best mate. And I think it's something deeper than just being about who the person is. Perhaps...not just who, but what. And, there's some sort of secret with something going on with Malfoy. Simplest answer usually's the right one, Harry. I think there's one secret, not two. Am I wrong?" 

Feeling a small sweat start to break out on his forehead, Harry denied it. "What exactly are you saying?"

Looking up at the sky for a moment, Ron tried not to shout in desperation. "Are you fooling around with Malfoy or not?" 

Everything felt cold to Harry at that moment: his vision, his skin. He didn't know what to do. There was no point in denying it because he and Draco would be going public soon, but this wasn't how he had wanted it to happen with Ron. This wasn't at all how he had wanted it to happen. And now he was worried about...well, about Ron judging him. For being with Draco. Or...maybe for being with a guy at all, Harry didn't know. 

"No," Harry said, straightening his shoulders and making his choice. "I'm not fooling around with Malfoy." He started angrily packing his books into his bag. "Things between Draco and I are actually quite serious, thank you very much." Without another word, Harry stood up and stormed off towards the castle. 

He knew it was a fake relationship, but that didn't make Harry's anger at the situation any less. He wanted Ron to be on his side and be supportive. And that meant letting your best friend come to you on their own terms, right? Not cornering them during a study hour. 

Losing his way around the castle, Harry found himself back in the common room...after Ron had already gotten there. 

Ron was on his feet as Harry walked in. Hermione was nowhere to be seen and the room was fairly empty. As soon as Harry saw his best friend, he rolled his eyes and turned to walk back out. 

"Mate, can we talk about this?"

Harry whirled on him, still not knowing fully why he was so angry. "What is there to talk about? It's my decision; it has nothing to do with you," Harry bit. 

"I'm not saying it does! In fact, I fully support you!" 

At this, Harry stopped. "What?" 

Ron rolled his eyes. "I think it's great, Harry. You two clearly have some unresolved tension. I was only hurt that you wouldn't tell me and I want to have a conversation with you about why. If it truly was because you didn't want to talk to anyone about it because you didn't want to fuck things up, then fine. But if it's because of  _ who _ it is, specifically, or the fact that," Ron lowered his voice, aware that there were others in the room. "That he's a guy, then these are things that I want to talk about because I want to make sure that you feel comfortable talking to me about these things. Who you like doesn't matter, Harry, I just want to be involved in your life."

Confused and most certainly not expecting this, Harry paused and turned fully back towards Ron. "So, what you're saying is...you support this?"

"One hundred percent," Ron said and Harry could tell he was serious. "'Mione and I have actually kind of been expecting it for a while now. We figured the tension between you two always had a bit of a sexual edge and we were wondering when it was going to finally resolve itself. And I'm sorry if I made it sound like that's all this is. I completely understand that it's something real and that you actually have feelings for him. I get it, Harry. And you can talk to me about these things." 

This was not what Harry had been expecting at all. 

"But, wait," Harry said. "How have you been expecting this for a while when he's a..." 

"Oh, Harry, Hermione and I have known for a long while now that you're not straight. No worries there, mate. That's kind of why I've been asking so often about who this person could be. I was thinking that maybe you were finally going to embrace that side of yourself and I wanted to make sure you know that Hermione and I accept you and love you so much. But, yeah, we've known for years." 

With the added knowledge that Harry had of his still being straight, this conversation was throwing him off much more than he had ever expected. Maybe this whole fake-dating thing was more than Harry could handle because what the  _ fuck _ . Apparently his friends thought he was into blokes. Harry himself had never even considered that. What would have made them think....

Before Harry could continue to work though everything in his mind, more people came into the eighth year common room. Harry was still lost in thought so he didn't pay them any mind until he realized that they had forced everyone else out from the common room. Oh, and "they" were Blaise Zabini, Pansy Parkinson, Hermione, and Draco. 

"Cat's out of the bag, Potter," Draco said. 

Harry reacted on instinct. "See!" He said, pointing at Draco. "You did it again!" 

"Oh, I am  _ so sorry _ ," Draco said, laying the sarcasm on thick, bending at the waist with his arms out to the sides like mockingly bowing at a king. "My dearest, darling Chosen One."

"Oh, fuck you, Draco," Harry said, not amused. Okay, maybe a little amused, but hiding it well. 

Draco's body snapped back up. "Bet you'd like that, Boy Wonder,” he winked. 

Harry blinked at him. "You really are insufferable."

"Aw," Pansy clasped her hands together. "This is exactly like how I always imagined them dating would be." 

Hermione turned towards her, a smile on her face. "Oh, I know right! This is going to be so interesting. It's kind of like a science experiment." She gazed back at the two of them. 

Draco walked towards Harry and for a moment, his back was to everyone else. "Pansy confronted me, Hermione overheard. Apparently, your friends think you're bent." 

Harry tilted his head and whispered to Draco, aware all their friends were still staring at them. "Yeah, Ron just confronted me as well, so I know all about that. He had actually guessed that it was you." 

"Really?" Draco said at a normal volume, before turning and raising a brow at Ron. "Nice going, Weasley. You're more observant than I thought." 

"Hey," Ron said. "Just because I support this doesn't mean we're suddenly friends." 

"Excuse me, that's my boyfriend you're talking to," Harry rattled off, without thinking. 

"Oh, so you're official?" Blaise asked, crossing his arms on his chest. "It's boyfriends now?" 

"Why do you look so upset?" Draco asked him. "Jealous, maybe?" 

"Well, of course I think Potter's hot, but that has nothing to do with the fact that I'm upset that you didn't tell me this." 

Draco rolled his eyes. "So sensitive," he said, before leaning in so only Harry could hear him. "How are you doing? Freaking out any? I know this is sooner than we had wanted, but..." 

Harry turned so he was facing Draco, steering his shoulder towards their friends, blocking their conversation. "I mean, I think it's better to just get it over with, you know? They were all going to find out at some point and Ron was starting to go a little crazy over the whole thing." 

"Well," Draco glanced past Harry's shoulder. "They're probably expecting something. I think they're all fairly convinced, but how far do you want to get into this right now?" 

Leaning in, Harry moved at the last minute to not kiss Draco, and instead whisper at his ear. "I think they're convinced enough. You're still so skittish about kissing me that I think we'll keep that until we really have to show off." 

He drew back and when he turned around, saw Pansy starting at them, jaw down. 

"Get a room, Potter," she said. 

Hermione giggled and just like that, Harry knew their friends entirely bought it. Now, their only obstacles were....the school at large and, of course, Lucius Malfoy. 

__________

Over the past two weeks as Harry and Draco went public--kissing just after they walked into the Great Hall, walking to classes holding hands, being seen together  _ everywhere _ \--Harry and Draco's friends had been unwaveringly supportive. They had even hung out with each others' friend groups. But it had been starting to get too much for Harry and he was beginning to get weirded out by the fact that his friends hadn't questioned it for a moment. 

And he was thinking about bringing this up to Draco. 

"Hey, babe," Harry said, one afternoon while they were sharing a table in the library. It was strange, but the more he had been spending time with Draco, the more he had been seeing similarities between him and Hermione. For example, Draco was seriously studying and Harry was drawing in the margins of his parchment. As always. 

At first, Draco seemed to ignore him, so Harry nudged his foot under the table. "Babe," he said again, and this time Draco looked up at him. 

"I heard you the first time, Harry." 

"Well, you didn't respond."

Draco gave him a half-smile. "I'm not  _ Witch Weekly _ , Harry, my life doesn't revolve around you." 

"Well, I  _ am  _ your boyfriend, so you could at least acknowledge my existence on occasion." 

Draco arched a brow. "On occasion? I suppose I could make a compromise." 

Harry rolled his eyes, trying to hide a small smile. "Look, there's something I wanted to talk to you about. It's kind of serious."

At this, something in Draco's face changed and Harry found that odd. He thought that by now he had started to really get a grasp on Draco's facial expressions, but this seemed to almost go cold. 

"Oh? And what's that?" He put his parchment to the side and gave Harry his full attention. 

"I think I'd like to tell my friends the truth. I think it's only fair. To be quite honest, I never expected them to be so on-board with it and it's kind of making me feel shitty knowing that I'm lying to them. You know I'm not good with lying, Draco. And Ron is being far more supportive than I..." Harry couldn't even come up with a qualifier. "I swear, if we don't tell him, he's gonna start planning our wedding. And that's got to be motivation enough for you because we both know any plans he makes, you would find atrocious." 

As Harry had continued to speak, Draco had been getting more and more upset, continually shoving it down to a locked box inside of his heart that he would never open. But then Harry got to the end and Draco couldn't help but laugh. 

"You're quite right, Potter. They would be atrocious." 

Without saying a word, Harry just gave Draco a look and Draco threw his hands up in exasperation, spreading knowing what Harry was meaning. 

"Would you let it go? Oh, I am oh, so sorry, Great Prince of Gryffindor, that I--"

"I'm just saying," Harry cut him off, hands out to the sides. "It was your rule." 

Draco just rolled his eyes, hoping that this would cause a lull and he could just get back to his Ancient Runes homework and Harry would drop everything. Forget he had brought it up. 

"Back to the conversation," he started, shattering Draco's hopes. "I won't tell them if you're not okay with it, of course. But I wanted to bring it up to you so that you know where I'm at and what I'm feeling." 

Trying not to reveal too much of his feelings, Draco chewed his lip a bit. Because he knew his feelings: the more that they acknowledged that this wasn't real, the more it hurt. Of course, it was going to hurt like a motherfucker when it all stopped being even fake but couldn't he have at least a little while where he could pretend? Because, yes, maybe it was a little bit more than Potter just being hot. 

"I just don't know," Draco started, reluctant. "If word gets out--"

"They're great at keeping secrets, Draco, you've got to know this by now." 

"Of course, I know," Draco hissed. He took a deep breath, trying to let his anger subside. "I just think that the safest way to do this whole thing is to let it run its course and never tell anyone the true nature. Hell, if you decide you're tired of people thinking you're bent--which, by the way, is actually the result that you wanted from this in order to get girls off your back but if you change your mind--you can always just say that you were just fucking around and experimenting with me. But if it gets out--" He glanced side to side, leaning closer to Harry and lowering his voice. "What's really going on, then it completely ruins the purpose for me. And let's be real, Potter, which of us has more to lose in this situation?"

"Hey, now what's that supposed to mean?" 

Draco rolled his eyes, setting back in his seat a little. "It means, Potter, that if it gets out that you aren't really bent, then the blame will somehow fall to me. I'll be the evil Death Eater who put Harry Potter under some sort of spell. You realize they're already saying that about me now that we're public, right, Harry? And, it hurts me doubly because then people are less likely to believe that I actually  _ am  _ bent, which is literally the whole entire point of this for me. Don't you see?"

But Draco knew he had lost Harry somewhere in there. Something in his eyes had gone hard and he had stopped paying attention. 

"Whatever," Draco started again, pulling his parchment closer. "You're not listening, anyway. I may as well give up. Do whatever the hell you want, Potter, my future be damned." 

For a few short moments, it was just the sound of Draco's quill on parchment between them. Then, Harry spoke, his voice low. 

"Are people really saying that?" 

Draco didn't look up. "What? Saying what?" 

"Are people really saying that you must have brainwashed me or something?" 

Still, Draco didn't stop his work on his homework. It was  _ homework,  _ after all, and it didn't have time to be wasted on Potter's mood swings. "Yes, Harry, what else would you expect? I'm an ex Death Eater dating the Boy Who Lived, precious Savior Potter. You really think people would just accept that at face value?" 

Next thing Draco knew, Harry's chair was knocked over and so was Draco's ink well, spilling all over his essay. "Damn it, Scarhead!" Draco yelled after Harry, ignoring the shushing it earned him. 

His things be damned, he followed Harry out of the library, having to jog to catch up. "Harry, what are you--" Out of breath, Draco gave a last, quick, half-run and grabbed Harry's hand. "What are you planning on doing?" He asked, tugging on Harry's hand and planting his feet on the ground. 

Harry turned towards him, eyes a little wild. "I'm not sure, exactly. But that's just not right." 

Draco rolled his eyes. "It's a small injustice of many in the world, Harry." 

To his surprise, Harry's fingers only tightened around his own. "Yeah, well, people aren't going to be saying that shit about my boyfriend." 

And maybe it was some twisted form of self-harm, but Draco's tongue almost started talking without him to remind Harry that he wasn't really his boyfriend. 

He would have, too, if Luna hadn't happened upon them. 

"Lovegood!" Draco called out, glad for the distraction. Potter always liked being around Lovegood; she seemed to even him out, calm him down some. He waved her over. 

"Oh, hello, Draco, how are you doing?" 

"I'm wonderful, Luna, how are you?" Draco responded. 

Lovegood pulled a bit of a face. "There's something terribly wrong today. Can't quite figure out what it is, but I think it has something to do with the clouds. Best not go flying today, you two." 

Draco nodded. "I'll keep that in mind. Isn't that interesting, Harry?" He pried, trying to get Harry out of his own head. But apparently, even Luna couldn't do the trick. 

"It's just so  _ wrong _ ," Harry insisted. 

"Wrong?" Luna's eyebrows scrunched. "Maybe it doesn't have anything to do with the clouds? Now that you say it, Harry, I think you might be right. I'll have to talk to Neville." 

"That's wonderful, Luna," Harry said, barely able to keep his tone in check before continuing on down the hallway. 

Draco politely said goodbye to Luna before--once more--jogging to keep up with Harry. 

They turned a corner into a deserted hallway, and Draco grabbed Potter by the wrist, harshly, and yanked him into an empty room. 

_ "What the hell is your problem, Potter?” _

"It's just--It's not right, Draco!" Harry threw his hands up. "What other reaction do you want me to have? You want me to just be okay with people saying things like that about my boyfriend?" 

Draco pressed his fingertips to his temples. "Firstly, I am not your boyfriend, actually, so you don't have any right. Second, that's just the way things are and are going to be for the rest of my life. Just because you don't like them doesn't mean I have the privilege to have them changed. And  _ third, _ there is no way that this is truly the cause of all of this. You don't get that upset by something so small." 

Clearly, something Draco had said struck a chord because Potter just...gave up. He crashed to the floor, leaning against a wall. "Yeah, I guess you're right. M'sorry." 

Draco sighed and sat down next to Harry. "It's okay. You just freaked me out a little, is all. I mean, you couldn't even pull it together to be nice for Luna." 

Harry cringed, putting his head in his hands. "Fuck, you're right. I should apologize to her." 

Waving his hand, Draco dismissed that. "I wouldn't worry. Luna loves you. You two have a great friendship." 

Sitting up, Harry looked at Draco. "We're friends, right? Even though we're not actually dating and not actually boyfriends, we're still  _ friends _ at least, right? Can't I stand up for my friend? Or did you think this was all a temporary truce? That I don't care about you any?" 

For a moment, Draco's brain scrambled. He didn't know what to say and now was not the time to be caught speechless. "Potter, I--" He sighed, looking down at his hands in his lap. "After this whole thing ends, I don't think we can stay friends. People are going to expect us to be broken up. And I think that if a pre-dating Draco and Harry would come within a single hex of killing each other once a year, post-breakup Draco and Harry surely wouldn't be able to get along." 

Silence stretched between them. 

"Right." 

More silence. 

Draco didn't know what to say. In all honesty, what he had said made sense. It was logical. But it completely ignored the emotional truth: Draco had developed feelings for Harry and there was no way he would be able to stay friends after all of this. It would hurt too much. 

What the fuck had he done? 

"We should tell our friends." 

Harry sighed. "Agreed." 

"Tonight?" Draco glanced at Harry, knowing that Harry was the one that wanted this done and that they both knew that was the only reason he offered so soon. 

Harry pressed his lips together. "Tomorrow." 

__________

Later that evening, the majority of the eighth years were all out on the grounds. They had decided to have a hang-out and there were games being played and people were dancing, laughing, joking. 

Harry and Draco were sitting together on a blanket, the perfect picture of a couple. 

In the evening light, Harry glanced over at Draco and tried not to sigh contentedly at the perfect shine the light gave to his hair.

Everyone was making noise and having fun and, away from it all, were Harry and Draco. Away from everything, but together. 

Most people were far enough to not be able to hear anything they would be saying to each other and no one was probably paying any attention to them anyway, but Harry would use being in public and around everyone as an excuse for why he kept staring at Draco while Draco talked. Harry wasn't even sure if he was listening because he was always so interested in what Draco had to say or because he just loved the way Draco's voice sounded as he talked. 

The conversation lulled and Harry leaned over and started kissing Draco. 

As soon as their lips touched, Draco felt nothing but sadness. He knew he was in love with Harry Potter. There was no denying it. Not anymore. And he was sad because this was all going to come to an end. Tomorrow morning, their friends would know this was all fake. It would be that many less people they would have to act around. Times like this, when they were making out for show in front of the school, were rare and Draco reached up, pushing his fingers into Harry's curls, wondering if this was the last time he would ever kiss Harry Potter. Because if so, he better make it count. 

__________

"You're probably wondering why we've gathered you all here today," Harry said to the group of his and Draco's friends he was standing in front of. 

They were in an empty classroom, Harry and Draco in front of Hermione, Ron, Pansy, and Blaise. 

Ron gasped, pressing a hand to his chest. "Harry, are you pregnant?" 

"How dare you assume he's the bottom in this relationship?" Draco snapped. 

Blaise began laughing, putting his hand on Pansy for support. "Could you imagine? Draco? As a  _ top _ ?" He laughed even harder and Pansy snickered behind her hand. 

To his credit, Ron turned towards Blaise confused, then glanced at Hermione. "What does that mean?" Hermione just pat his shoulder. 

"Don't worry about it, dear," she said. 

Harry cleared his throat, effectively calling the room to order. "Draco and I," he started. "Have something we've been wanting to tell you." 

"Oh shit," Blaise muttered. "I think someone is preggo." 

Pansy swat him on the arm, giving him a look that told him to shut up. 

Harry pinched his nose. "No one is pregnant, no is dying, no one is--doing anything. In fact," he dropped his hand and glanced at Draco. "No one is dating, either." 

Four jaws dropped in front of them and after a shocked beat of silence, everyone began talking at once.

"You broke up?" "What do you mean?" "How much you wanna bet they're getting married?" "How could you break up?" "You two are perfect for each other!" "Draco, what the hell?" "When did this happen?" "How long?"

"Okay, okay,  _ okay _ ,” Draco held out his hands to quiet them. "Could you listen for one moment, you aggravating, annoying little--" He stopped when Harry gave him a small look. 

Harry took a deep breath. They had both agreed he should be the one to deliver the news. "Draco and I were never dating." 

Now, all four of their friends just looked confused. "What'd you mean?" Ron asked. 

"A few weeks ago, Draco and I decided to appear that we were dating in order to accomplish a few personal goals: on my end, getting girls to stop chasing and assaulting me; for him, to bring me back to the Manor in an effort to convince Lucius that Draco is, in fact, gay." 

Pansy and Blaise both immediately nodded, clearly accepting both of these things as facts with a perfectly logical solution. Then, for a quick moment, Blaise raised his hand. 

"So, one thing," he said. "When you get back from this whole thing with Lucius, could you put that memory in a pensieve and let me watch it because I truly would like nothing more." 

"Seconded," Pansy added. 

Draco gave a few small nods that assured his friends there was no question for that. 

"Harry," Ron started. "What the hell? You're telling me that you were never dating Malfoy?" 

Harry nodded. "That's correct." 

"That doesn't make any sense." 

"Why not? How is Draco and I  _ not _ dating making any less sense than  _ Draco and Harry dating. _ ”

Ron sat with his mouth open a moment. "It just does. I've been expecting you two to date for years. I figured all that sexual tension would have to go somewhere at some point.  _ This _ on the other hand, is just..."

"Ron," Harry started. "What sexual tension?" 

In response, his best friend looked at Harry like he was the stupid person for asking such a question. "What other tension do you two idiots even have?"

"Ron," Harry tried again. "I'm not even bent. I'm straight. I like girls." 

"You can like girls and boys." 

"I like  _ only _ girls," Harry insisted. 

"Now, there's a part I didn't see coming," Pansy said. 

" _ Thank you! _ ” Ron yelled. 

"Okay," Harry said. "I'm actually a little concerned that everyone seems to think I'm not straight. Not that I'm not secure in my sexuality or anything, but I just....What do I do that makes people think I like men?" 

"Harry," Hermione started, sympathetically. "What don't you do?" 

"Well for one," Blaise added. "You made out with Draco on the lawn for two and a half hours last night. I should know: I timed you. You went a twenty minute stretch without taking even a small break. And you wonder how people could possibly think you don't like men." 

"Well, yeah, that was clearly for show because the whole point of this is to get enough people to think I'm gay and then I don't have to worry about girls chasing me and--one girl grabbed my hand and shoved it under her clothes. I don't want to deal with that shit anymore. That's why Draco and I started this. And let's be honest, just kissing someone doesn't really say anything about your sexuality. Kissing boys and girls is literally the same. Everyone has lips. How does that have anything to do with sexuality?" 

Hermione buried her face in her hands, Pansy and Ron shared a look, and Blaise just laughed. 

"Now that," Blaise said. "Sounds like something a bisexual would say. As a pansexual, I should know. Because I feel the same way, Harry. It doesn't matter." 

Pansy put her palms on her cheeks, momentarily covering her eyes. "How could you think that kissing guys and girls is the same? I remember I once had to kiss Theo in a game of spin the bottle--who is, in fact, the least masculine man I know. Even Draco's more masculine--and it could not be more different from kissing girls! Girls are soft and they smell nice and they take such good care of their hair--"

"Thought you just said Draco's masculine," Blaise interjected, but Pansy was unbothered and kept going despite the look Draco gave Blaise who only grinned in response. 

"And boys are like, smelly and bony and facial hair is fucking disgusting and they don't take care of their skin! It's like, when you kiss a girl, there's all these great and wonderful things. And then you kiss a guy and he's trying to shove his tongue down your throat and his hand up your shirt--"

"Now, I'm  _ positive _ Theo did not try and feel you up."

"Well, I have in fact kissed guys other than Theo. He was just an example. All I'm saying is, as someone who is solidly only attracted to women, kissing men and women is not the same." 

"Seconded," Ron said. 

Blaise leaned back in his chair to look at Ron past Pansy. "Oh? And you've kissed enough men to know, Weasley?" 

Ron shot him a dirty look. "I have not kissed any men. And I'm saying that I wouldn't because  _ I _ only like girls and therefore agree with Parkinson thoroughly." 

"Well, we can always do a little experiment right now to find out," Blaise teased, winking. 

"Will you all stop?" Draco finally spoke up. "The point of this isn't to have a round table about Potter's sexuality. He can figure that out on his own time." 

"Hey," Harry tried to interject, but Draco waved him off. 

"The point was to tell you all that we aren't actually dating and we're supposed to be going to dinner with my parents this weekend and a week after that, we're going to 'break up.'" 

Ron sighed. "Look, mate, I don't understand it, but thanks for telling us, I guess. Not that I agree or anything and I would like to state for the official record with everyone present that I do not believe you for a second when you say that this is all entirely fake because I believe that some part of you, however small, has  _ always _ been at least a little bit in love with Draco Malfoy. I mean, you two are like magnets. Nothing has been able to keep you from crashing into each other. Ever. Everything between you two has always felt a little, 'All's fair in love and war,' if you know what I mean. But that's just me." 

"It sure as hell isn't just you," Blaise said. "Pansy and I agree, but, hey what do we know about Potter, right?" He rolled his eyes and stood up to leave. Before he reached the door, he turned back a moment. "Look, I really don't care, you two. Just do me one thing, Potter, and make sure Lucius gets his dues, yeah?" With that, he walked out the door. 

Shaking their heads, Pansy and Hermione soon followed, leaving just Ron in front of Harry and Draco. 

Ron turned his palms up and shrugged. "Don't know what else to tell you, mate." Then he, too, left. 

__________

Later, Harry and Draco were sitting in their spot and Harry was still trying to make sense of what had happened with their friends earlier. 

"So what did you mean by 'Potter can figure that out on his own'? Because, personally, I thought I already had it figured out." 

Draco gave him a flat look. "Look, don't take offense or anything, but...there's something to be said about your best friends thinking that you're into men. It just...it's a little compelling, is all. I mean, I knew about Blaise before I knew about myself and Blaise knew about me before he knew about himself. We can see it in other people easier because we can see the ways that they look at people they like and we can't see that with ourselves and it's easier to deny with ourselves. Now, I'm not saying you are bent, Potter. I'm just saying don't be too hard on your friends. What they're saying might have more truth than you may know. I mean, have you ever  _ really _ thought about it?"

"Well, no," Harry admitted. "But I don't have to. I know I like girls." 

"Knowing that you like girls is not the same thing as knowing that you don't like boys." 

Harry seemed to think on that for a moment, but Draco couldn't be sure what he made of it. 

"How did you know?" Harry asked. 

Ah, that was always the question, wasn't it? Everyone who was questioning wanted to ask someone else that same thing. How did you know? Because everyone is different and it would be so easy to hear that someone else knew they were gay because of specific-to-them XYZ and then to say to yourself that that didn't happen to you so you're not gay. Nope. You get to be normal.

But Draco figured he was just being passive-aggressive with himself and he should probably just answer Potter's question. So he started: 

"I had some hints. But I kept denying a lot of them."

There was just one small problem. The exact moment when Draco couldn't deny it anymore was...well it was second year with Harry speaking parsletongue. That was when Draco had understood not just what it was to have a harmless little crush, but to...well... _ feel something _ . Something...a little more...adult. 

Draco shrugged, continuing. "A lot of people see the signs and explain them away. A lot of people know when they're kids, but they just never knew that not everyone felt that way. I mean, when I think about kissing other boys..." Here, Draco paused for a moment. "I don't know. It makes me all warm and I want to do it and I want--Look, I don't how to explain this. But when I think about kissing girls, it's not something I want to do. It's a little revolting. And when I picture being held by someone who loves me like that, it's always a man. 

"And when I picture my future with a man, that is what makes me happy. My husband and me and our children. But when I picture the life my father wants for me with a wife...I don't know, Potter, it just feels so wrong. Basically, being with a girl is something I would have to force myself to do. And this isn't getting onto the actual topic of sex, either. I mean, I'm a pureblood, Potter, we don't talk about sex." At this, Harry laughed, and Draco felt his face heat up a little. Oh, he really was falling for Potter, huh? Or, rather, had already fallen for. 

"Okay, but," Harry interrupted. "I feel like sex really is a big part of it, you know? Like how do you know if it doesn't have anything to do with sex?" 

"Well, it doesn't entirely. But, you're right, sex is a part of it, for sure. But when you really get into things and into the community you learn so much more and you discover so much more about gender and sexuality and the ways that they're intrinsically interrelated but they're not dependent upon one another at all. And they mix and match in many different ways. And I don't think I can really explain that all to you well and I think that getting into it right now would just confuse you more, but it's something we can talk about when you have the basic, flatlined version of binary sexuality understood." 

"Does that relate to what Blaise was saying about him being pansexual? What even is that?" 

Draco sighed, leaning his head back against the wall. There was just so much Potter didn't know and, of course, it would be up to Draco to explain it all. 

"Some people say that pansexual is the same as bisexual. Some people say that they aren't the same at all. Both sides that say either of that are kind of right and kind of wrong so we don't agree with either--"

Harry cut him off, laughing a little. "So then what--"

"Would you let me talk, Potter?" He glared a little and Harry pointedly closed his mouth and indicated Draco continue. "Some people say that the difference between bisexual and pansexual is that pansexual includes people who are nonbinary but that's basically just calling all bi people transphobes and that's just wrong. Some people say that pansexual people care about personality more than they do anything related to gender and genitals and sex and bisexual people still do care about those things as well, but that's an interesting and confusing line to walk. Overall, I think you can basically boil it down to the slight distinctions are really up to personal preference about how someone feels about the terms. So Blaise identifies as pansexual instead of bisexual because he is more comfortable with the term and he feels that the slight distinctions better express how he relates to his attraction to others." 

Harry nodded slowly. "I think I understood half of those words. I liked when you used words like 'the' and 'is' because I got those. Er...I guess you're right. There's a lot I guess I don't know." 

"Well, yeah, Potter. There's a whole community you've never interacted with." 

"Also," Harry started again. "Can you please explain to me what Blaise meant when he was talking about that 'top' thing?" 

Draco looked up at the ceiling. "Circe, please tell me I don't have to explain this to Harry Potter. I cannot look Harry Potter in the eyes and explain to him what a top is." 

"Oh, so it has to do with sex." 

Snapping his head down, Draco glared again. "Of course it has to do with sex! Were you paying attention at all? Look, it's very simple. During sex, there is a top and there is a bottom. That is literally all it is. That is how simple it is. And we don't need to discuss it further." 

Harry sat for a moment, thinking. "So is it like..." 

"Don't you dare keep talking," Draco muttered, eyes closed. 

"Like who takes it up the arse?" 

Draco buried his face in his hands. "Merlin, this can not be happening to me." 

"Oh!" Harry exclaimed in realization. He hit Draco lightly on the shoulder. "That would be the bottom! Oh, that makes so much sense. Cause it goes in and--"

"Stop!" Draco threw his hands up. "Just stop, Potter. Just stop fucking talking, please!" 

Harry laughed loudly, the kind where he would tilt his head back and laugh towards the sky. "Wow," he said. "You really are a prude." 

Draco didn't even bother defending himself. "Oh, cause you're so much better." 

"Hey, I can at least talk about sex." 

"My roommate is Blaise." 

Harry nodded. "Fair enough." He turned back to Draco. "How joking was he when he propositioned my best friend earlier?"

Draco shook his head. "Not. He was not joking. He thinks all the Weasleys are hot. Especially Bill and Charlie." 

"Well, I mean..." Harry shrugged a little. "Charlie's Charlie. But  _ all _ the Weasleys? Like, even Percy?" 

"Unfortunately, I made the mistake of asking Blaise the exact same question and he gave me a highly detailed description of exactly what he would do to Percy Weasley in bed. But, no, when I say all the Weasleys, Blaise includes Arthur and Molly." 

Harry laughed that loud laugh again, putting his hand on Draco's shoulder for support. "You've got to be kidding." 

"Unfortunately, I am not. Living with him has taught me many, many things about him. Particularly that he's mostly talk. He told me--in confidence, so Potter, you have to promise you won't say anything to anyone--"

"I wouldn't dream of it." 

"He's only ever had sex with three people. But after the first one, rumors started flying and people just started making up sexual encounters with him because he's hot and he never corrected anyone for two reasons: one, he's a Slytherin and it's better to have people talking shit about you than not knowing your name and, two, now everyone thinks he's some sort of sex god and he could hook up with anyone if he really wanted to. He likes to keep his options open." 

Harry and Draco both laughed a little bit. "Look at us," Harry said. "Gossiping about our friends like a right couple." 

Draco laughed a little more, but it was nervous, this time. "It's strange, isn't it? This whole, Draco-and-Harry-are-friends, thing." 

Leaning his head back against the wall, Harry smiled at Draco. "There's just one problem."

"What's that?" 

"I don't want our breakup to mean this has to end." 

With a sharp inhale, Draco looked down at his hands. "I thought we already had this discussion." 

"Well, I want to have it again. C'mon, Draco, you can't say this isn't nice. I mean, talking to you is just so different. There are so few people who can truly understand what we feel and what we're going through with the war and everything." 

"You have Ron and Hermione." 

"Yeah, but they're dating. It's kind of changed our friendship. But there's one major thing that you get that they never will." 

Still looking at his hands, Draco asked, "What's that?" 

"They had a choice. However small, they had a choice. They could have left. I mean, I know they wouldn't've, being my best friends and all. But I  _ had _ to. I had no choice. My choice was I either died or everyone else died. Their choice was whether or not to stand by their friend. You didn't have a choice either. For us, it was do or death. For them, it was just do or be a shitty friend." 

"Still, I don't think it's a choice that ever crossed their minds, Harry. You know they wouldn't have even thought it." 

"Course not. But at the end of the day, I was the only one involved in some prophecy. My fate was decided for me. They chose to stand by me. Your fate was also decided for you. It doesn't change much but it's still different. And we were all just kids and we were all, in a way, forced into it. But it...it was different. You know, Molly and Arthur kept trying to keep them out of it. If Hermione's parents would have known, they'd have done the same. No one did that for me. Because they couldn't. I didn't have parents I could run to and bail on the whole war. I couldn't coward out. You get that." 

Draco nodded. "I understand what you're saying. I don't think it's fair to Ron and Hermione, but I understand." 

"I just--" Harry sighed. "I like talking to you. You get me. It's nice, us being friends. And I don't want it to go back to how it was. I like how it is now." 

Knowing he had to shove his feelings down, Draco turned away and stared at the wall across from him. "That's nice, Harry, but it still doesn't change the situation, does it?"

"There's got to be another--"

"This is just how it is. You just have to give it time, after the breakup. Okay?" 

"Like how much time?" 

Inwardly, Draco knew he didn't want to have this conversation because he didn't want to have to take this stance. He wanted to stay friends with Harry. He wanted to stay more than friends with Harry, actually. How could he tell Potter how much time he needed to get over being in love with him? How could he know how much time he would need? Because if, in the future, they were to go back to being friends, Draco would constantly still feel the urge to kiss him, to go back to this. How long until that would fade away? Or would it ever?

"I don't know, Potter." 

"Right." 

The two sat in silence for a while and all Draco could think was how much he wished to know what was going through Harry's mind at that moment. 

Because Draco was so in love it was crushing him. 

Eventually, Harry broke the silence and Draco was grateful because he didn't want to leave the conversation there. 

"Are you ready for this weekend?" 

"As ready as I'll ever be." 

"So how exactly do you want this to go? What did you tell your parents?" 

Draco sighed. "I told my mum. And I told my mum the truth. Well, okay, our current version of the truth. I told her that I was bringing my boyfriend to dinner."

"What did she say?" 

"She gave us the time and asked if my guest had any allergies. She did not mention the word 'boyfriend.' So, overall, I'm not sure how it's gonna go." 

"Do they know it's me?" 

Draco laughed. "Do you think we would have gotten the invite if they did?" 

Harry nodded. "So what you're saying is that I'm going to show up on Lucius Malfoy's doorstep basically unannounced and try to convince him that I, Harry Potter, am dating his son."

"Yup." 

"I'm sure it'll go great." 

__________

Standing on the doorstep, fresh from the apparation, Harry tried not to fidget while Draco wrapped his hand around the large, brass knocker on the front door of Malfoy Manor. 

"Don't have great memories of this place," Harry muttered. 

Draco threw a look over his shoulder. "Yeah, neither do I, Potter."

Coming up behind him, Harry put his arm around Draco's waist. "You're really gonna have to pay attention to that tonight. Consider everything we've done at school training for this night. It's got to be full-on couple, okay? No slip-ups." 

"You're telling me. They're my parents." 

Draco glanced at Harry quick before the doors opened and reached to fix an unruly curl, placing it back where he wanted it just as the door swung open. 

Harry gave Draco a small tap on the back and he turned to find his mother in the doorway. 

"Mother," he greeted, brightly. 

"Draco, darling. And...Harry Potter." She tried to not let her hesitation show, but Draco knew his mother too well for that. She knew Draco was bringing a guy and she was fine with that but Harry Potter was not what she had expected at all. Clearly. 

Harry nodded. "Evening, Mrs. Malfoy." 

Narcissa's eyes quickly dropped to Harry's hand still on the small of Draco's back before they jumped back up and she smiled. "Come on in. Draco, dear, your father's in his study. He'll join us for dinner." 

Draco grabbed Harry's hand from behind him and led him into the entryway of the dark and imposing Manner. 

Or, at least, dark and imposing was how Harry had remembered it. "Wow," Harry said to Draco, quietly. "Looks a lot different from how I remembered it."

Draco nodded in return, not bothering to lower his voice. "During the war, the house was always so dark. It felt like there was dark magic radiating from the very walls. These days, it's much more comfortable. Like when I was a child. It's just an old house. Like I said, a lot of secret passageways. It was great fun as a kid, honestly. And discovering a lot of those secret passageways was really helpful for avoiding a surprise Cruciatus during the war." 

"Draco, must you talk of such things?" His mother asked him. 

"What? Harry's only been here the once. I don't want him to think Malfoys live in some sort of dark hollow. It's a house of elegance and poise, no matter the shadow cast on it by the war." 

Narcissa raised an eyebrow. "And when exactly was Mr. Potter here?" 

Draco's eyes widened and he shut his mouth. "Don't tell Father," he said. 

"Darling," Narcissa started. "We all knew it was him. And now I see why you couldn't identify him. Why you were protecting him." 

Harry gave Draco's hand a squeeze. It seemed to be working, at least on Narcissa. They exchanged a look and Draco smiled at Harry. 

Narcissa told Draco to be in the dining room in half an hour or earlier and after he assured her that they would be, Draco pulled Harry off into the house. As they were walking, he suddenly stopped and pulled on a vase that was sitting on a hallway table. A door opened up beneath the table. 

Draco turned to Harry, smiling as if a dare. "You gonna have to crawl for this one." 

"When have I ever been one to shy away from--" 

Rolling his eyes, Draco dropped down and disappeared into the dark. Harry, of course, followed. 

"The door will close on it's own," Harry heard from in front of him. 

They crawled along in the dark, Harry occasionally accidentally grabbing Draco's foot or ankle and he was sure Draco was desperately trying to resist the urge to kick him in the face.

"Careful," Harry said at one point when he almost did. "You've already broken my nose once. Just, slow down for a second and I'll get my wand out and cast a--"

"Don't!" Draco practically yelled. "There's a maze of systems in the walls of this house and I found out years ago that if you cast a lumos to help you find your way through them, you'll be lost for hours. It's part of a curse to make sure these passageways are only used by those who live in the houses and therefore know them really well and not used by an intruder who wouldn't have them memorized like I do. We're turning right up here." 

After turning and continuing on a ways, Harry started to notice bits of light slanting down from above them.

"Draco, what part of the house are we in?" 

"You'll see," was all Draco said. And then, in what little light there was, Harry saw Draco stand up. 

Harry followed and Draco quickly cast a cleaning charm on their clothes. 

Draco pointed up a ladder. "We just have to go up and through the trapdoor. It's not that long of a climb. You ready?" 

"Why wouldn't I be? What's up there? Oh, I know," Harry crossed his arms over his chest, faking looking serious. "This has all been a ploy to trap the great Harry Potter and--"

"Oh, you're absolutely right, you Wondrous One. The rumors all around school have been true: I have brainwashed you for this very moment." 

Together, they laughed and then Draco led the way up the ladder, pushing the trapdoor open and reaching a hand down to help Harry out. 

When he came up it was into a small, attic room that was packed with items with a singular, triangular window on one wall. 

Draco walked around the room, expertly weaving between the stacks of forgotten things. "I spent a lot of time up here in my life. Before and during the war. It's a Forgotten Room." 

"What'd you mean?" 

Turning, Draco raised an eyebrow. "You don't know what a Forgotten Room is?" 

Harry just shook his head and Draco launched into his explanation. "A Forgotten Room is guarded by a mirage. That window," he pointed. "Isn't visible from anywhere on the grounds. Objects that have been forgotten magically appear in the Forgotten Room. When you lose a sock, when you can't remember which book has that piece of information you're looking for, when you grow out of your old pair of trousers....Things just show up here once we forget about them." 

"Do they ever come back?" 

"Rarely." Draco ran his hand over one of the items next to him. "It takes a concerted effort to bring them back. I mean, think about trying to recall a memory you've forgotten. You know it was there at one time, but now you can't remember what 'it' was. Sometimes, there will be the rare occasion that you remember again. But usually, it's all gone forever. The Forgotten Room is a place where things that don't exist, can exist in peace." 

"How did you find it, then?" Harry began clumsily making his way towards Draco, focused more on his feet than the words coming out of his mouth. 

"I've always had a vague memory of having a dream where I was here when I was a young child. It's now my theory that when I was young and my parents weren't used to being parents, they would sometimes forget about me. Only momentarily, of course, but I think that for those moments, I was here. And I sought it out one day when I was young. After the first time my father used the cruciatus curse on me, I wanted to be forgotten. And I wandered around inside of the walls and then I pushed up through the trapdoor and I was here." 

Harry had reached him by now and he put his hands on Draco's waist. 

"Draco, I'm so sorry." 

But Draco just kept talking. "You see, when you're in the Forgotten Room, you are momentarily forgotten. It's easier for people to remember you because you came here by choice and not by naturally being forgotten. Sometimes when you're here someone will remember you and the room will start to spin and look funny. It doesn't like it when that happens. Best to leave. But I would come up here a lot because of that. I mean, think about it, Potter." He looked at Harry now, once more reaching up to mess with Harry's curls, placing them back where he wanted them. "Isn't it sort of comforting to know that you're not on anyone's mind right now?" 

Draco would never have said that to anyone else. But with Harry, he knew he would understand. Harry was famous and he hated it, always wanting to stop being bothered. He never wanted the attention, never wanted to be center-stage. That was why Draco knew he wanted to show Harry this room. 

"Except yours," Harry said, his voice low. 

"What'd you mean?" 

"I'm not on anyone's mind right now but yours." 

Draco felt Harry's hands tighten on his waist. 

"One more thing about Forgotten Rooms, Potter." 

"What's that?" 

"You forget about them. And what happens in them. By their nature..." 

And just like Draco had been hoping, Harry kissed him. Because it was safe. It was safe to explore in the Forgotten Room because they would both forget about it. It was safe when Harry's hand slipped under Draco's shirt because Draco would forget about his touch there. It wouldn't plague him every night as he went to sleep. He and Potter could do anything, right now, and they would never remember it. 

Before Draco knew it, he was on his back on the dusty floor with Harry leaning over him. 

"Touch me," Draco whispered. "Harry, please." 

And without a word, Harry did. He kissed Draco's neck as his hands moved lower before setting back on his heels to take off Draco's shoes and then his trousers and his pants while Draco ripped off his shirt. And then there he was, lying on his back on a dusty floor of a Forgotten Room, naked with Harry staring at him. 

Of course, Harry could stare at nothing but the scars on Draco's chest. 

Sitting up, Draco cupped Harry's hand in his cheek. "It's okay, Harry. Really, it's okay." 

Softly, Harry kissed him, holding the back of Draco's head lightly as he guided Draco back down to the floor. Wordlessly, then, Harry removed his own clothes before resuming kissing Draco. 

"We don't have much time," Harry whispered. "If dinner's ready, your mum will remember and start to wonder where we are." 

Draco nodded. "The room will start to collapse around us in an attempt to get us out." As he spoke, Harry nudged Draco's knees further open. 

"How do I do this?" Harry asked. "Tell me what to do, Draco. I'll do it for you. I'll do anything for you." 

Quickly, Draco muttered some spells Blaise had taught him and then guided Harry inside of him. 

They moved together slowly, focused more on exploring and feeling each other's bodies, kissing, touching. But it didn't last long before they found themselves speeding up and sweating, breathing heavy. 

And then it was over, Draco's hands in Harry's hair, their foreheads pressed together, and Harry kissed Draco's face, then the side of his neck. He picked Draco up, sat up with him, wrapped his arms around him and held him close as they both let their breathing even out. 

Then, Harry noticed something in the room flicker. "Draco, we have to go. We have to get going." 

They pulled back from each other a little and looked into each other's eyes. There was so much Draco wanted to say, but there wasn't the time to say it. 

He kissed Harry one last time and then whispered, "I love you, Harry." 

Just as he did, the room began to swirl and collapse, the floor beneath them starting to shift. In a panic, they both jolted up and practically dove for the trapdoor so they wouldn't be thrown magically, violently, from the room. Just as they were about to close the trapdoor, Harry accioed (wandless, the prick, Draco noted) their clothes and shoes and wands to them and then let the trapdoor slam itself shut. 

They dressed quickly in the darkness and then Draco led them out through the tunnels and minutes later, they were both spelled clean and on their way to the dining room. 

By the time they sat down, they had both forgotten what, exactly, had happened. And by the time they began talking, neither remembered having gone to the Forgotten Room at all. 

They entered the dining room hand-in-hand and Lucius and Narcissa were both already there, waiting for them. Clearly, Narcissa had decided to not tell her husband who exactly Draco had brought home to dinner because Lucius barely masked his look of surprise. 

Or, rather, Draco should call it shock. 

Needless to say, his father was decidedly not happy. 

They all sat down and Lucius spoke first. "Mr. Potter. I wasn't expecting you. My wife had told me that Draco would be bringing home a friend." 

Taking it in stride, Harry just smiled. "Well, I understand your surprise. I'm not here as Draco's friend." He smiled a little bit wider. "I'm his boyfriend."

Lucius nearly choked on his wine and Draco tried to not laugh. "Excuse me?" Lucius asked, pointedly setting his glass down and looking at Harry. 

"I'm dating your son." 

Lucius straightened in his chair. "Draco, I thought we had this discussion and came to a solution." 

"Actually, I don't recall that," Draco said. "What I do remember was telling you that I'm gay and you threatening to disown me before you beat me." He leaned forward in his seat. "But you're already walking the line between this house arrest and Azkaban so let's see you try to do that again when my boyfriend is Harry Potter." 

"Draco, why are you doing this?" Narcissa asked. 

Hurt, Draco turned to her. "Really, Mother? I thought you had worked through this." 

"Darling," Narcissa began. "I understand that you like men. But marriage isn't about liking someone. And all this is going to do is have the papers involved in every detail about your life. They're going to tear you apart, Draco, as if they haven't enough already. Can't we just have something in this household that isn't a fight between you and your father? I understand you like men, and I support that, but--"

"Everything you just said indicates you don't support that, Mother." 

"I'm just worried about you, darling. This makes your life so much more difficult. If people knew--"

"All of Hogwarts knows. The papers know. The papers have been dragging our name through the mud for a long while now. My being gay really doesn't make that much of a difference. I know you're concerned about how hard it is to be an out, gay wizard, mum, but you haven't considered how much it hurts to not be myself. And it's far worse, I assure you." 

Narcissa stared at her son, tears welling in her eyes. "Draco, dear, I'm so sorry. I love you no matter what and I--"

"I want you out of my house right now." All eyes turned to Lucius. 

"Dear--" Narcissa began, but Harry cut her off. 

With a slow hand, he set his wand on the table. He didn't keep it in his hand, but it was in sight and they all saw it. A warning. One Lucius did not heed. He spoke only to Draco. 

"You will leave my house this instant. There will be a wedding this summer between you and Ms. Greengrass-- _ it has already been decided by her father and myself _ \--and you will stop this nonsense by then. But you will not be allowed in my home as long as you insist on being a deviant--"

Harry grabbed his wand, still keeping it lowered. "Don't you dare speak to him that way." 

"I will speak to my son however--"

Harry stood. "As long as I'm here, you  _ won’t  _ speak to my boyfriend that way." Harry shook his head. "Out of all of the lovely people in this world, how did it happen that a piece of shit like you somehow was blessed with such an amazing child and yet you do nothing but ridicule and abuse him. You don't deserve to speak to him at all unless it's a groveling apology. And if you ever dare to address him like that again, I will--"

"You'll what, Potter? Report me to the Ministry? Get me thrown in Azkaban? He's my son and I'll--"

Harry laughed. "Azkaban?" He twirled his wand between his fingers. "No, you're going to learn to treat your son right or I'll deal with you myself. And you and I both know I'm not some perfect little angel the papers make me out to be. I will use Unforgivables." 

Looking over at Draco, he motioned for him to stand. Clearly, they were leaving. They began walking out of the room, passing by Lucius' chair as they did so. "So to summarize, Mr. Malfoy. Your son is gay, the wedding is off, and you will treat him with respect." He leaned in close to Lucius. "Or I kill you." 

He straightened up, taking Draco's hand. Looking at Narcissa, he smiled and gave her a nod. "You have a lovely home, Mrs. Malfoy. Have a nice evening and thank you for having us." 

When he was done, Draco guided them back out of the Manor, still holding onto Harry's hand. Once the door closed behind him, Draco's energy was completely drained. He had been so focused on holding himself together that as soon as the door closed, he burst into tears and started shaking. 

Without saying anything, Harry wrapped his arms around Draco and apparated them back to Hogwarts. 

Draco barely noticed the apparation, but could see the outline of the castle through his tears and knew Harry was going to get him back home. Harry wrapped an arm around Draco and held his elbow with the other hand, slowly starting to walk him across the grounds. After a few steps, Draco stopped him. 

"I can't--Harry, I can't." 

Stopping, Harry turned towards Draco and wrapped him in a hug. "It's okay, Draco, it's all going to be okay." 

"I can't do it," Draco said into Harry's shirt. 

"It'll all be okay." 

Draco pushed him away. "No, it won't, Potter!" He smeared his hand across his face, wiping away tears and snot. "Harry, it--I can't do this. I thought that I would be okay, but I'm not. I thought that I could handle--hearing my father say those things and I thought that--that if he said those things then I don't want to be around him and I don't want him to be my father and I thought--" Draco stopped and sobbed for a quick moment before continuing. "I thought that all the bad things he's done have made me hate him enough already that I already don't want him to be my father. I thought I already hated him. I thought I would be okay. But, I'm not, Harry, I'm just not." 

Harry closed the gap between them and, again, pulled Draco close. 

"He's the worst person I know!" Draco continued. "And I hate him for everything that he's done. He's a murderer!" Draco looked at Harry. "Why does it still hurt?" 

Pushing back Draco's hair, Harry let his hand rest on Draco's cheek, his thumb wiping at fresh tears on Draco's skin. "Because through it all, he's still your dad. And part of you is always going to hope that he'll be better. You'll always wish that your dad wasn't a Death Eater, that he wasn't a murderer. And you thought that just because he's a bad man wouldn't mean that he would ever be capable of feeling that way about you. You’re his son, Draco. What you're feeling is natural." 

Draco bowed his head again, wanting nothing more than to just keep crying. "My entire life, he has been nothing but terrible. He beat me, he crucioed me, he brought the Dark Lord back from the dead, he--" Draco sighed. "I can't even begin to cover it all. And yet, through everything, I never wanted anything more than his approval." 

"That's because it's the exact thing he always kept out of reach from you, Draco. All kids ever want is for their parents to show they love them and to make their parents proud. And that doesn't fade even as those kids become adults. It's all we want from our parents. He never let you have that. Of course that's going to hurt, Draco." 

Now, Draco glanced up. "You don't think it makes me a bad person for wanting his approval? Because--"

"Of course it doesn't. He's your father. Being a 'good' or 'bad' person is something someone chooses and can change. You can't change that he's your father. No one can fault you for that, either." Harry reached up with his other hand so he was cupping both of Draco's cheeks. 

"Draco, through everything and all the ways that he treated you, you never wanted anything more than love. You never looked for revenge, you never let it make you bitter about the world. You're just looking to be loved. And that says so much about you. At your heart, Draco, you are good. You are so good. You are not your father, Draco." 

For a moment, Draco looked fine beyond his bottom lip quivering and then he exploded into tears once more. His body felt so heavy he just wanted to collapse on the ground and the next thing he knew, he was sitting on the grass and Harry was holding him as he cried. 

__________

Harry slammed the door behind him. Ron looked up from his desk where he was writing a letter to his mum to see his best friend pacing after storming into the room. 

"What's gotten into you, mate?" he asked. 

As he walked, Harry just shook his head angrily. 

After a few minutes, Ron figured Harry wasn't going to tell him so he just gave a half shrug and started to turn back to what he was doing. But then he turned back as Harry started ranting. 

"See, here's what I don't understand." 

Ron set his quill down, able to tell that this was going to be a long one. He was about to respond, "what's that, Harry?" but his best friend just continued on before he could make any input. 

"Now, obviously I'm still not clear on how and why everyone thinks I could maybe be into men, but let's just put that aside for a moment and go back to how you could possibly think I could be into  _ Malfoy _ .”

With the way Harry spit out the name, Ron's eyes widened. This was a sudden shift in his demeanor. Just last week the two had gone to Malfoy Manor and had returned closer than ever. In fact, they had gotten to a point when Ron and Hermione and Pansy had guessed they maybe wouldn't break up after all, but that this "fake" relationship would evolve into something real. So apparently, they had had some sort of fight. 

"I mean," Harry continued. "What a  _ fucking arse _ . What a  _ piece of shit _ . In fact," Harry stopped his pacing, turning and pointing. "I don't think I even have a proper range of curse words and insults to accurately describe how despicable he is." 

Something cracked in the air like static electricity and Ron stood up from his chair. 

"Okay, mate," he started. "We're starting to get a little bit of accidental magic happening because you're so mad, so maybe we should just try and calm down a little bit for something happens." 

Harry glared. "I feel like killing him." 

The room gave a shake. 

"Yeah, okay," Ron's tone became a little harsher. "And if you don't calm down, you just might kill us when the  _ room collapses on us, Harry _ .”

Closing his eyes, Harry tilted his head up towards the ceiling and took a few deep breaths. Ron could feel the energy in the room start to decrease. 

When he had calmed down, Harry crashed to the floor and sat, looking less angry and more hurt. 

Ron moved to sit next to him. "So do you wanna tell me what happened?" 

Harry stared at his feet, outstretched in front of him. 

"Every time I say anything regarding our situation or even about us being friends, he has to say so nasty that I'm not  _ actually _ his boyfriend and I know it's true but it's like he only says it to try and hurt me, as if I would never be good enough to be his boyfriend. Which I don't even know why I care because--" He shot a glance at Ron. "I don't like him like that, but it still hurts. And then--" 

Clearly getting to the point that made him truly hurt, Harry cut himself off and Ron gave him the space that he needed. By now, he knew his best friend well enough to tell when he was trying not to cry and Ron knew if he brought it up, Harry was only going to get more upset because he would think Ron only mentioned it because he was trying to push some sort of 'I knew you liked him' agenda. So he just sat in silence and waited for Harry to continue. 

"I found out today that this whole faking-dating thing has been working out for him really well." 

"What'd you mean?" 

Harry pressed his lips together and took a few steadying breaths. "Well, apparently since he came out, a couple guys have indicated their interest." 

"But he's dating you!" 

With a sickly laugh, Harry glanced over at Ron. "Which he never fails to remind me isn't real." He went back to staring at his feet. "So why should that stop him?" 

In the silence that followed, Ron tried to not let his jaw drop. 

"So one of these guys," Harry continued. "Has been continually hanging around Draco. He's been giving Draco presents and writing poems and shit. Real old-timey courting type of shit. And you know, good and proper pureblood families love that kind of thing. Which this guy is also from, by the way. Just what Draco's always wanted. A good, Slytherin boy from a good, pureblood family. And Draco's acting like if he had brought this boy home instead of me, maybe Lucius wouldn't have been such a homophobe and kicked him out." 

"I'm sure he doesn't think that, Harry." 

"You sure?" Harry turned to Ron with the most scathing smile across his face. "Because he said about as much in our fight earlier." 

"Harry--" 

"But that's not all he had to say after I caught him necking with Kensington Burke in  _ our spot _ .”

Ron cursed under his breath. He had really thought the two of them could have been something, but leave it to Malfoy to fuck things up. 

"No, he also had to tell me that, uh, he feels disgusted being around me and he wants me out of his life forever. I've made his life a living hell for seven and a half years, and that's enough for him, thanks." Harry's voice cracked on the last word and his face crumpled before he dissolved into tears. 

Never one to be good with tears, Ron didn't really know what to do, so he awkwardly put an arm around Harry. 

"Ron, I thought we were friends." 

"I'm so sorry, Harry. Fuck that guy." 

Harry straightened up and Ron could practically see him willing himself to stop crying. "Yeah, you're right. Why did I ever think he could be anything but an arse. Should never have done this. Officially the worst idea I ever had." 

"Harry--"

Standing, Harry took a deep breath. "Thanks, Ron, but I'm all good now. I see the mistake I made. I get it. He never cared about me ever and he's made that clear now. I see that. So, it's all good. I'm over it." With that, Harry walked out the door. And Ron knew without a doubt that Harry had realized that he was in love with Draco. 

__________

He had snuck back into his parents house and through the tunnels until he was standing beneath the trapdoor. 

Something had happened in that room. 

Draco just couldn't remember what it was. 

What he did know was that four days after the dinner with his parents, Draco had had this same feeling and had gone back to the Forgotten Room, wanting to remember. And he had. Of course he had. Naturally, the memory still faded when he left the room, but he knew how he felt afterwards. 

Disgusted. Absolutely disgusted. And he had known that he needed to get Potter out of his life. 

So when Kensington came around yet again, Draco hadn't stopped him this time. When Kensington had taken Draco's hand and asked if Draco knew anywhere they could go where they weren't likely to be seen, Draco had taken him to his and Harry's spot. Looking back, he wasn't entirely sure why he had done it; maybe he had wanted Harry to find them because it would be easier than just telling Harry. It made the breakup feel real and caused a fight and left no room for Draco to go slinking back to being friends with Potter, caught in the hell that was being Harry's friend without being with him. 

Well, consider Draco lucky for avoiding that. 

In the darkness, he clamped a hand over his mouth to quiet the sounds of his sobbing. 

Now that he had gotten rid of Harry, he hadn't been able to rid himself of wondering if there really was a good reason why he had done it. He had done it because of whatever happened that night in the room he was beneath now and he had to know if he had made the right choice. 

He grabbed the ladder. 

The moment Draco pushed the trapdoor open, it all started coming back to him: 

_ “...The Forgotten Room is a place where things that don't exist, can exist in peace." _

_... _

_ “Draco, I'm so sorry." _

_... _

_ “Except yours." "What'd you mean?" "I'm not on anyone's mind right now but yours."  _

_ “One more thing about Forgotten Rooms, Potter." "What's that?" "You forget about them. And what happens in them. By their nature..."  _

Draco stumbled as the memory hit him, and he sat down, tears starting to stream down his face. 

" _ Touch me. Harry, please." _

_ “I’ll do it for you. I'll do anything for you." _

_ “Draco, we have to go." _

_ "I love you, Harry." _

The memory finished and Draco was back in his own body, sitting on the floor of the Forgotten Room with wet cheeks. He wrapped his arms to hug his body, pulling his knees to his chest. 

What had he done?

The disgust he had felt was with himself. He felt slimy for bringing Harry to the Forgotten Room in the first place. He had done it with ulterior motives. He had been trying to see if Harry would kiss him with no audience, if it was safe. If Harry had an excuse, would he hold Draco? If there was no chance of even either of them knowing, would Harry make love to him? 

Draco felt disgusted with himself because he had tricked Harry. And he was revolted by the fact that he had told Harry he loved him, that he was too much of a coward to tell him outside of this room. And the lingering feelings he had felt about Potter when he last left this room had been because Harry hadn't said that he loved Draco back. 

And what had Draco done? He had pushed Harry away. And he had done it so well there was no chance of ever going back. 

__________

Months passed. The closest Harry and Draco got to interacting was when Harry shoulder-checked him in a crowded hallway. 

He had broken things off with Kensington, of course, if there was anything to have been broken off. He had told him he just wasn't feeling it and had earned a string of curses in return, both verbal and magical. He had been yelling about how Draco had been "leading him on" and called Draco a whore. Which Draco didn't get because he had barely even let Kensington kiss him. 

They hadn't had to create their large, public breakup. After their fight, the school quickly caught on that the two were no longer together. And after the first girl had approached Harry and he had gotten so angry the walls of the Great Hall had started shaking, the Wizarding World's Most Eligible Bachelor was considered "Temporarily Off-Market Due to Devastating Heartbreak." Or, at least, that's what _Witch_ _Weekly_ had written. Both Harry and Draco kept quiet about what had happened and so did all of their friends so no one outside of their friend circles had a clue about the truth. 

The truth that Harry and Draco were never dating in the first place or the truth that Draco had broken Harry's heart. 

"Hey, love, you gonna put that toast in your mouth or just hold it until the end of breakfast?" Pansy's voice jerked Draco out of his thoughts. 

From the side of him, Blaise put a hand on his shoulder and leaned across the table to whisper harshly at Pansy. 

"Would you give him a break? He's sensitive." 

Pansy rolled her eyes. "Draco, darling, I love you endlessly. But you're never going to feel better if you keep wallowing and--" Her gaze slid to Blaise. "We should not be enabling him in that behavior. He needs to eat, Blaise." 

Draco dropped the toast back on his plate and shrugged off Blaise's hand. "Actually, I'm not feeling well. Could one of you tell Flitwick? I'm gonna go lie down." Before either of them could say anything, he was walking away from the table. 

Instead of going back to the dorms, he walked straight out the doors of Hogwarts and didn't slow until he was past the Apparition line. Then, he Apparated himself straight to the Manor, scaled the side, tumbled in through his bedroom window, and slipped into the walls. 

Once more, he stood beneath the trap door.

He would never admit it to a soul, but Draco had been back here nearly every week since his breakup with Harry. He still couldn't remember what had happened when he was outside of the room, but he still wasn't sure if he wanted to. Every time he left, he just felt gutted. But he kept coming back because he had to know. He had to remember.

And each time he left because remembering was too much. 

Grabbing the ladder, Draco promised himself as he climbed that this would be the last time. The Forgotten Room that had provided so much solace in his childhood had been forever tarnished by this memory. This would be the last time he would ever go into it willingly. 

When he closed the trapdoor behind him an hour later, the memory of what it felt like to have Harry inside of him faded, and Draco kept his promise to himself. 

__________

_ Four Months Later _

Harry groaned, letting his head fall onto his open textbook as Hermione continued to drone on and on. They were working on their final project for Defense Against the Dark Arts, which Headmistress McGonagall was allowing as a group-project stand-in for their NEWT. Naturally, Harry and Ron had clung to Hermione and she had only agreed to be in a group with them if they actually did the work and actually studied. She had cast a spell that would indicate who had done what work on their final report and if it was more than fifty percent Hermione--they had talked her up from a third because that was just unrealistic--Hermione reserved the right to completely kick them off the project at the last minute and they would have no legal right to use any of the work that she did for the project. 

They agreed because they knew she would thrive without them and that they would be screwed without her. Even though it was Defense, it was still a report and "I Killed Voldemort" was not going to be enough to get Harry a good score (even if everywhere he applied for work would completely overlook whatever DADA score he got anyway. Like, cmon. He killed Voldemort. Just hire him already). 

They had decided to do their report on Occlumency. They had been working on the project for three weeks and it was due at the end of this week. An entire month and now their work was culminating at the moment of actually writing the report. 

And Hermione was lecturing them on memory theory. 

For the first week, Harry had relied on his ligilimency lessons with Snape and had taught Hermione and Ron both a bit about the art of occlumency and ligilimency. Then, they had moved on to the history of the practices. The third week had been focused on the cultivation of the practice and now Hermione had decided that what they needed to do to take the report one step further was to look into the elusive magics of the theory of memory magic as a whole. 

"Harry, could you at least look like you're paying attention?" 

Dutifully, Harry lifted his head as Hermione continued to talk. 

She droned on and on and Harry's eyes started wandering around the library. Three tables away sat the group of Slytherins Harry refused to look at. Even from where he was in the quiet library, Harry could single out Draco's voice from the rest. Not that he was being particularly loud, Harry had just naturally become accustomed to the particular intonations of Draco's speech cadence. 

While they were on the topic of memory theory, was there any possible way that a person could forget something like that? Like every time they had kissed someone? Could anything make Harry's fingers forget Draco's hair? 

No. Even if someone obliviated him, his body would always remember. It would always feel like something was missing. A hole in him. 

And he didn't want to forget. Because he didn't want to ever forget how much Draco had hurt him. 

When he saw in his peripheral vision his quill starting to shake on the table, Harry took some calming breaths. Now was not the time to get worked up over Draco. It had been months. As far as anyone else knew, Harry was over it. 

Totally and completely over it. 

Hermione continued to talk and then suddenly tapered off. 

"What is it?" Ron asked, his tone betraying that he wasn't really that interested. 

Looking a little lost in thought, Hermione started slowly reaching for the stack of books next to her. "I think I know what would get us the highest mark in the school." 

With a flat voice, Ron said, "Yippee." 

"Ligilimency works on sentient beings, right?" 

Shifting, Ron started to actually look awake and interested now. "Right. People are sentient and ligilimency works on them." 

"Yes," Hermione said slowly. "But does it work on  _ all  _ sentient beings? We know Wampus Cats can perform ligilimency. Animals can do ligilimency. And what all of these creatures have in common is being sentient." 

Harry was confused. "Okay, but what other beings besides humans and animals and magical creatures are there that are sentient? There aren't any. So why--"

Hermione's eyes lit up. "Oh, but there are. Hogwarts castle is sentient." 

"What?" Ron asked. 

"Seriously, Ron?  _ Hogwarts, A History. _ How many times do I have to..." 

"Okay, okay, go on, then." 

"So do you think there would be a way to apply memory theory to sentient magical creatures that aren't alive?" 

The three of them stared at each other for a moment. 

"Hermoine," Harry said. "That doesn't sound like something that would get you top marks on a DADA paper; that sounds like something an Unspeakable would spend their life on." 

Smiling proudly, Hermione sat up a bit straighter. "Well, considering that's what I plan to do starting next year, wouldn't it be nice to show them that I have quite the mind for it? And then you two get to be co-authors on what was the original hypothesis. How cool is that?" 

Ron and Harry exchanged a look and conferred. "Mate, let's just let her do it." Ron said. "I mean, if we don't, she's going to go crazy." 

"Yeah," Harry said. "But remember we agreed that we do fifty percent of the work on this project so we can't just let her run with this all on her own. We're going to have to do half the work on this and I don't even understand it." 

"Look, it'll be fine. If we just let her tell us what to do, she'll let us keep our names on it." 

Thinking for a moment, Harry nodded. "You're right." 

Together, they turned back to Hermione. "Any recommendations for what book I should go find first?" 

Smiling, Hermione clasped her hands together. "Oh, you'll let us include this in our report? You two are such good friends! I knew this was going to be fun! Okay," she sat and thought for a minute. "We should start with thinking about the nature of ligilimency and occlumency." 

"Well, here's a problem," Ron mentioned. "When you do ligilimency, you're looking into someone's memories. Just because a creature is sentient doesn't mean they necessarily have memories. I mean, where would they store it? And what would it look like? Would they have a long-term memory or just a short-term or neither or both?" 

For a moment, Hermione appeared stumped and then--without a word--her face lit up and she stood up from the table, practically taking off across the library. 

Leaning back with a smirk on his face, Ron looked over at Harry. "C'mon, mate, you know when she really gets onto something she just up and runs off without saying anything. Plus, I think this whole thing is just gonna end up a dead-end, anyway. And you know that if it isn't a viable theory, she won't include it in the report. Wouldn't want her name on something that isn't fully logically sound." 

Harry laughed. "You're right. I should have just trusted you." 

The two pulled their parchments and quills back over to them and continued working on their assigned sections of the final write-up. They had to get them to Hermione in three days so that she could review and edit them and make them rewrite them. 

Harry hadn't even gotten a paragraph written before Hermione was back with multiple volumes of  _ Hogwarts, A History _ and one very large, black book that she must have gotten from the Restricted Section that sent up a cloud of dust when she dropped it onto the table.

Ron started up in a coughing fit. "Damn, 'Mione."

"Sorry," she said, but her mind was a world away. 

She opened the large book and skimmed through some pages until she must have found what she was looking for. 

"Aha! I knew it was in this book. Okay." She swiveled the page so that Harry and Ron could see and they both leaned over to look at it. 

"So," Hermione started explaining. "Kind of like the Room of Requirement, there is this thing called a Forgotten Room and--"

All of Hermione's words immediately faded into the background. Suddenly, Harry was gone from the library and he was in a dusty attic room with a triangular window. 

Draco was beneath him. 

Draco's naked torso, his pale skin, the paler scars that crossed it. 

Harry was holding him, kissing him, inside of him. The moment he heard the words "Forgotten Room" Harry could see Draco arching his back, tipping his neck, his eyebrows coming together and his mouth parted. He could hear the moans Draco made each time Harry moved. He could feel Draco's hips beneath his hands and taste the sweat from his neck as Draco pulled his hair while Harry fucked into him. 

He heard Draco say, "I love you, Harry." 

He blinked and he was back in the library. Hermione was still talking but Ron had noticed something happened. 

Already, Harry knew the memory was fading. He couldn't let it get away. He needed an explanation. 

All this time, he had forgotten what had happened in that room, specifically that Draco had said that he loved him. And it was true. That was why he had said it in the Forgotten Room where neither of them would ever remember it or ever have to confront it. But this changed everything. 

Because the only reason Harry had been able to stay mad at Draco these past months was because he had convinced himself that Draco had never cared for him. And that wasn't true. It just wasn't true and Harry couldn't let himself forget that. 

He needed answers. He needed to know why Draco pushed him away, what all that shit was with Kensington, what the fuck had happened between the Forgotten Room and then.

Without a word to his friends, Harry pushed his chair back and walked across the library to Draco. He was losing the memory, he knew, so he had to get to him before that happened. There was no time to waste. 

Arriving at Draco's table, all the conversation had stopped and the three turned to look at him. Just as Blaise was about to speak up, Harry--not slowing--grabbed Draco by the arm and pulled him up, walking out of the library with him. 

"Potter, what are you doing?" Draco tried to ask, but Harry didn't say a word. 

Draco continued to question him as Harry walked, tried pulling his arm out of Harry's grip, but he wasn't able to. By the time they had gotten outside of the castle, Harry had forgotten what had happened in that room. But he knew something had and that he had to go back there and find out. 

He didn't say a word until they were officially off Hogwarts grounds, in Apparateable space. Then, he dropped Draco's arm.

"Side-along me to the Manor. Now." 

"What the fuck, Potter? What's your problem? I'm not taking you to my fucking house. Firstly, you ruined my life last time we were there and secondly you're acting crazy right now." 

"Look," Harry said. "I'll apparate you there against your will but it'll have to be outside of the wards of the Manor and then I'll have to drag you across the grass and that'll only take longer. So if you would just do us the honors yourself, I won't have to drag you through your mother's immaculate garden."

Glaring, Draco grabbed onto Harry and then they were at the Manor. Clearly upset, Draco started scaling the wall and disappeared into a window before leaning back out and indicating Harry follow. 

"For fuck's sake, Scarhead, let's get a move on. This was your idea and Merlin only knows what crazy fucking thing you're planning." 

Harry landed inside the room and stood up, glancing around. For a moment, he almost forgot what he was doing and why he was there. 

"Is this your bedroom?" he asked. 

Draco looked like he was going to slap him and Harry was quickly reminded that things were different between them. Months ago, Harry would have been delighted to be in Draco's childhood bedroom. And now things were just so different. 

It hit him then that that was exactly why he had brought Draco here! There was something...Something had happened in the room...What room was it? 

"The room," Harry said. 

"Yes, you made that clear that this is my fucking bedroom, Potter, congrats for top marks on your idiot NEWT." 

Harry glared. "The room you showed me last time. It was some sort of...Fuck, I can't remember." 

"The Forgotten Room," Draco said. 

Snapping his fingers, Harry said, "That's it! Take me there." 

Draco froze. "No." 

Starting to get exasperated, Harry fought off a sigh. "Draco, that's the reason I brought you here. Something happened in that room." 

Draco shook his head. "I know." 

"You know? Look, Hermione had said something about Forgotten Rooms and I  _ had remembered _ but now I can't! I don't know what happened there. Tell me." 

Sighing, Draco ran his hand through his hair, an exasperated habit he had unknowingly picked up from Harry. "I don't  _ know _ . But I do know that I've been back there since and I always leave feeling like shit after remembering. So I don't want to go back there and you don't want to either. Whatever happened, we should just leave it alone. Things are bad enough between us." His voice got quieter. "What if it only makes it worse?" 

Harry shook his head. "No. You're taking me there. You got to decide that you don't want to know, but I didn't. I remembered and I brought you back here because I didn't want to forget it again. You don't get to make that decision for me. And I can't get to the room without you. You know I'll get lost in the walls." 

"Then get lost," Draco bit. 

"For fuck's sake, Draco!" Harry threw his hands up. "Don't you get tired of this? Please, can we just put everything aside for a moment? Can you just show me? We'll see what it was and we'll share one last happy memory of when things were good with us and if whatever happened in that room doesn't change anything, then we'll decide together that it doesn't change anything and you never have to show me it again. I will relinquish that right. But I have the right to see it at least once. It's my memory, too, you know."

Still having a bit of a soft-spot for Harry, (okay, that was downplaying it--still being in love with Harry,) Draco gave in. 

"Fine. Follow me." 

The two walked through the halls quietly, checking around corners before turning them. They didn't want to be seen by Lucius, that was for sure. A few twists and turns later, they arrived at the vase and Draco tugged on it before dropping down into the crawl-space. 

Harry followed him and it was amazed at how familiar it all was. This part he hadn't forgotten at all. It was so clear in his memory. But thinking only minutes after it, he was entirely at a loss. 

After Draco stood up, Harry came to stand next to him and they both hesitated at the bottom of the ladder. 

"Are you  _ sure _ , Potter? Because we can still turn around." 

"We're gonna forget the memory when we leave anyway, right?" 

Nodding, Draco turned and led the way up and into the Forgotten Room. 

The trapdoor opened and he gasped. Even as the memory started to wash over him, Draco reached down like last time and helped Harry into the room. Their hands stayed together as they both remembered in an instant everything that had happened. 

For a moment, they just started at each other. Draco couldn't move. He was standing in front of Harry Potter--who fucking hated him once more--and they both are remembering that Draco had told Harry that he loved him. 

Still holding onto Draco's hand, Harry leaned forward and kissed him. He didn't hold back. 

They kissed for long minutes and Draco tried not to cry, but he failed. All he thought was how this was just like last time. It was safe. They were going to forget so kissing right now was safe. 

Harry pulled back and wiped Draco's tears. Everything was just so familiar and Draco had missed it so much. He opened his mouth to say how sorry he was, but he wasn't quick enough. 

"I love you, too," Harry said. 

Draco blinked. "What?"

"Last time we were up here, I didn't get a chance to say it back. The room started to collapse before I could and then we were back in the walls and I forgot that you even said it. And you deserve to know that I was going to say it." 

"Oh." Draco disentangled his hand from Harry's. 

"Oh?" Harry asked. "Oh, what?" 

"You're only telling me now because you want me to know that you were going to say it then." 

Harry shook his head. "No, Draco. I love you now. Even though you broke my fucking heart and I've kind of hated you for months now, I love you. And I don't think I'll ever stop loving you. Even though you kind of tricked me into losing our virginities to each other in a room where we would literally never remember it." 

Draco laughed a little. "I suppose you're right. Hadn't thought about that." 

Still shaking his head, Harry sat down on the floor. This was going to be a long conversation, he felt. Because he had questions. 

"Why?" Harry asked. "Why did you do it, Draco? Why'd you say those things?" 

Bottom lip shaking, Draco wrapped his arms around himself, trying to not cry again. "I was hurt, Harry. I was scared. I was in love with you and you didn't say it back and I thought, of course you didn't say it back. You're straight!" 

Harry rolled his eyes. "Draco, I fucked you. Right over there." He pointed. "I don't think I can still say that I'm straight. And sorry that it took me so long to catch up with the program; I had, in fact, forgotten all about having sex with another man." 

Draco sat down on the ground, facing Harry. "Yeah, sorry about that." 

"You said I disgust you, Draco." 

"That's not true! I said I felt disgusted being around you." 

"How is that any different?" Harry yelled. 

"I was never disgusted by you!" Draco yelled back. "I was disgusted with myself." He got quiet now and avoided Harry's eyes. "Because I brought you up here." 

Harry let the silence be for a moment, hoping Draco would continue without prompting. But no such luck. "What'd you mean?" 

Draco scoffed. "Think about it, Harry. You were into me and we all knew it except you wouldn't acknowledge it. You were in denial. I brought you here because it would be a safe space for you to let your true feelings show because even you wouldn't remember them. I did it to try and get you to kiss me, to figure out how you really felt and what you would do when put in an environment with no consequences. I tricked you. And then I forgot about it. But my body wasn't able to stop reacting; it still knew what I had done. So every time I looked at you, I felt disgusted with myself for bringing you up here with an ulterior motive." 

Looking down at his hands, Harry gave a small nod. He supposed that would make sense. "You said I made your life hell for seven and a half years and that was enough for you, thanks." 

"Being around you is torture." 

Harry's head snapped up. "What the hell, Draco? I'm trying to make amends here and--"

"Will you shut up, scarhead?" Harry shut his mouth. "I've been in love with you for years. I said what I said because I knew that if I didn't actually hurt you, you would eventually try to be friends again and I'm just not strong enough for that. I can't be friends with you because I want so much more. I can't watch you one day get a girlfriend. Every time you kiss her, I will remember what kissing you is like. It's torture, Harry. You either have to love me or hate me. I can't stand anything in between." 

"One more thing," Harry said. He looked Draco in the eyes. "Why Kensington?" 

Draco shrugged. "He was there." 

Harry raised his eyebrows, not buying it. "There has to be more to it than that." 

"I needed to know what it felt like to kiss someone who actually knew he wanted to be kissing me." 

Lifting a hand to his face, Harry covered his eyes as if that could stop the tears. "Draco, I--" He stopped, not able to continue on. 

Sniffing, Harry wiped at his eyes. "I'm so sorry."

Draco sat and looked at his hands. "I'm sorry, too. Just because I was scared didn't mean....I know I didn't handle it well, Harry." 

"I didn't handle it much better either." 

The two sat in silence for a minute, not really sure what this meant for them. 

"We should leave here," Harry said. 

Now, Draco looked up. "Do you regret having come up here?" 

"No," Harry said, sharply. "Not at all. I don't regret coming up here in the first place because I think you're right: I was in denial and I needed the safety of this room to acknowledge that I'm in love with you. And I don't regret coming back up here because I'm still in love with you. And now everything makes so much more sense." 

Draco fidgeted with his hands. "So what does that mean for us?" 

"I'd like for it to mean we can put this all behind us. The last few months, the fighting. But I'm worried that even if we come to that conclusion now, we're gonna forget about it as soon as we walk out of here."

"The feelings stay, though. We might not remember the words, but we'll know how we feel." 

Harry laughed a little, but it was sad. "We're gonna have sex for the first time again, not knowing it's not the first time."

"Our bodies'll know. Maybe we'll put it together then. Maybe it won't fade that time." 

"We're gonna have to tell each other we love each other for the first time again." 

Draco nodded. "That we are." 

Harry shifted as if he was going to stand up but abandoned the idea. He didn't want to leave and forget. Didn't want things to go back to how they were. "Well, if you were able to go back--which we kind of are--if you had a choice, where would you choose to lose your virginity? For good, this time."

Half sure Harry had only said it to make him blush, Draco put his head in his hands, hiding his face. 

"Cause I'll take you to your childhood bedroom and fuck you right now." 

Draco dropped his hands. "What is it with you and that bedroom?" 

Harry shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe it's just that kind of childish 'I'm in a boy's bedroom' kind of thing." 

"Yes, because you've never been in one before." 

"Oh, shut up, would you? As if you wouldn't have that same little 'there's a boy in by bed' thrill if we went back there right now." 

Smiling, Draco said, "Fair enough." 

Standing up, Draco moved to sit closer to Harry. Neither of them needed words to tell that the kiss was coming and they let themselves relax into it because they were safe with each other, not because of the room. 

"Draco, what if--"

Eyes still closed, Draco shushed him. "We're not going to forget. Not this time. I won't let us." 

"Good. I don't want to forget." 

"But we should," Draco pulled back. "Get going." 

Harry nodded and stood, walking over to the trapdoor. He held it open and Draco started down the ladder. Taking one last glance around the room, Harry breathed deep. He just had to remember what Draco said: his body wouldn't forget. 

Looking down, he saw Draco standing at the bottom, waiting for him in the darkness. 

"Hey, Malfoy," he said. 

Even in the shadows, Harry could see the arch of Draco's eyebrow. 

"I love you." Then, Harry put his feet on the ladder and let the trapdoor swing shut. He landed on the ground next to Draco, forgetting already what he had just said, but Draco stared at him, tears in his eyes.

"What?" Harry asked. He got his answer when Draco grabbed his face and kissed him. 

"I love you, too, Potter." 

Looking a little confused, Harry just said, "I love you, too. Why do I feel like that's not the first time we've said that?" 

Draco smiled. "I don't think it was. I think we must have said it up there." 

"Wonder what else happened up there, then?" 

For a moment, Draco seemed to be considering something. Then, he walked to the wall to his right instead of back into the crawl space and he pushed his shoulder against the wall. 

Harry followed him through the walls and after a few minutes, they pushed open into Draco's bedroom. 

Without hesitation, Harry started kissing Draco, backing them towards the bed and they sat, just enjoying being with each other. Neither knew what had happened while they were in the Forgotten Room, but they knew things were alright between them. They didn't need to worry. 

Suddenly, Draco broke the kiss, laughing. 

"What?" Harry asked. 

He put a hand over his mouth. "I just thought 'there's a boy in my bed' and I'm having the strangest sense of déjà vu."

They resumed kissing and Harry laid Draco back on the bed. "Yeah, this all feels a little..." He started and then a look of realization came over Draco's face. 

"Like we've done it before," Draco whispered. 

Quickly, Harry's hand dug around in his pocket until he pulled out his wand. He spelled the door shut and started working on Draco's clothes. It didn't take long until everything from their shirts to their socks were on the floor besides Draco's bed. 

Pausing, Harry ran a hand across the scars on Draco's chest. "Draco--" He started and Draco took his wrist, shaking his head slightly. 

"It's okay," he whispered, his voice barely audible. 

Bending over, Harry kissed each of the scars along their length. "I love you," he whispered and then his hands tightened on Draco's hips. 

It was strange, but as Harry continued, he found that his body knew already what to do. And he knew for sure that they had done this before. But once he was inside of Draco, he knew this was a memory he would never forget. 

The two held each other close through the entirety, kissing and taking their time. Many 'I love you's' were exchanged between the two as they moved together. 

When it was over, Harry didn't move for a moment, just brushed Draco's hair back from his face. As he did, all of the memories started coming back to him. 

He heard Draco telling him that he found the Forgotten Room on his own after the first time his father crucioed him, he saw the first time they had sex, felt Draco kiss him. He knew their entire conversation and reconciliation. And he looked in Draco's eyes and knew that he remembered it all, too. 

__________

_ The Next Day _

Draco woke up, confused at first why he was in his bedroom at the Manor, but then he felt the warm body next to him and smiled, everything coming back to him. He was done fucking around with memory, that was for sure, because he wanted this to stay with him for the rest of his life. 

He nudged Harry, knowing they should be getting back to Hogwarts. Luckily, Harry had pulled them away on a Friday, so they had only missed their afternoon classes, but their absence was surely noted. They would probably get pulled into McGonagall's office for being gone all night. So they should get back before someone started to worry about them.

Harry stirred in his sleep, making an unhappy noise in the back of his throat before throwing an arm across Draco and pulling him close. 

"Wake up, Oh Chosen One, we've got to go let your friends know we've haven't dueled to the death." 

Harry kissed just behind his ear. "I've already come back from the dead once, I don't think they'll be too worried." 

"I assure you, I am quite the threat." 

"Oh, yeah," Harry muttered. "Voldemort? No problem. That little blonde twink though..." 

Draco jabbed him in the ribs and Harry's eyes flew open. "Ow! Okay, damn, I'm up." He sat up, ran a hand over his face, and looked at Draco stretched naked across the sheets. Draco was about to sit up as well, but Harry put a hand on his chest to stop him. "Wait, wait," he said. "Just let me enjoy the view a sec." 

Rolling his eyes, Draco tried not to smile. He swatted Harry's hand away. "You do realize we now have to tell our friends we're together for real this time, right?" 

Harry sighed heavily, a serious look coming over his face. "Only on one condition." 

Feeling like someone had dumped ice water over him, Draco sat up, readying himself. "What is it?" 

Now, Harry burst into a smile. "You never stop calling me Potter when I'm an idiot." 

Draco laughed, swatting Harry's arm again. "Get your clothes on, scarhead." 

"Only if you promise to take them off again." 

By now, Draco was standing next to the bed and collecting his clothes. He picked up Harry's trousers with his foot and then threw them at Harry. "Oh, just put them on." 

"I'm sorry, I never heard you agree to my condition." 

"Yeah, I don't know if that's going to work for me. I mean, I'd like to call my boyfriend by his first name at least some of the time and if I promise to call you Potter whenever you're being an idiot..." Harry, of course, threw a pillow at him. 

__________

"You're probably wondering why we've gathered you all here today," Harry said and was met with four unimpressed faces. 

"Oh, would you all stop?" Draco snapped. "You're acting so smart that you knew, acting so high and mighty." He looked at Pansy and Blaise. "Because you both knew right away that you weren't straight, uh huh, sure. And you two," he pointed at Ron and Hermione. "Never had any drama when you were starting to get together. No, for you two, everything worked out just fine. No miscommunication whatsoever." 

Harry put a hand on his arm. "Alright, Draco, let's just...calm down." 

"I'm just saying! They're all acting like you aren't oblivious in general. They're acting like you aren't a disaster at romantic relationships in general. I mean, what did they expect?" 

"Hey--!" Harry started. 

"Fair enough," Ron said, nodding. "Draco's right, Harry. It's not your fault. We really shouldn't have been so hard on you." 

"But I mean," Hermione interjected. "You're so competent in so many other areas, Harry. But even you have to admit that you're just not that observant." 

"What'd you mean?" 

Ron cringed. "Mate, Cho Chang asked you to go to Hogsmeade with her and specifically mentioned it was on Valentine's day and you were absolutely baffled as to why she would point that out. You did not get at all that she was asking you out."

"To be fair," Harry said. "Everything that happened with Cho Chang was a disaster." 

"I'm sensing a pattern here," Blaise said. 

"So, what," Pansy started. "Are you two finally official then?" 

Harry took Draco's hand. "Absolutely," he said. "And the world better fucking get used to it cause I'm super in love." 

"So this means..." Ron said. "...you're...?" 

"Still not sure about sexuality labels. They're all really confusing and I figured, why worry? I know I'm in love with Draco and the rest doesn't matter. I pick him." 

"Cool," Blaise said. "So, uh, one quick thing." He sat forward in his chair. "No one ever showed me Potter putting Lucius in his place...?" 

"Well, he did threaten to kill him," Draco told him. 

"No way!" 

"Fuck it up, Potter," Pansy smiled.

"Anyway," Draco continued. "We've reconciled things with my mother and she is in full support of us. Once we really talked about it, at heart the only reason she had never been fully supportive in the past was because she was worried about me facing any more discrimination. But we had a really good talk and she understands now. And she's really glad that I'm dating Harry. She said she thinks what has my father the most upset is that now I'm literally never going to shut up about Potter. Oh, but for the record, he's still pretty homophobic. We're working on it, but I'm afraid every conversation for next couple of years at least may end up with Harry pulling his wand on my father." 

Harry shrugged. "If that's what it takes." 

Blaise shuffled around for his wand and a moment later, he was extending his hands forward. "So I conjured up a Pensieve. In case anyone wants to..." 

Draco rolled his eyes. "Is it possible for you to have any patience? Ever?" 

"Look, I'm just compiling material for my best man speech." He shot a glance at Ron. "Best get a move on, Weasley. You're behind the curve." 

Hermione spoke up before Ron started arguing. "So are we going to get back to our NEWT project? Or are we gonna sit here all day discussing things we already know?" 

"Okay, shit," Harry said. 

"Great," Hermione said, standing and grabbing a stack of books she had set on the floor. She started ushering Ron out the door and Blaise and Pansy stood up and followed as well, chatting. 

Harry turned to his boyfriend. Reaching up, he pushed a small strand of hair off of Draco's forehead. He leaned in to kiss him, but was interrupted by the door swinging wide open and Hermione yelling, "Harry!" at him. 

Stealing a quick kiss, Harry followed her at the door. "I'll see you later, Draco!" 

"Be seeing you, scarhead." 

__________

_ Three Years Later _

Harry was unpacking yet another kitchen box when Draco walked in, likely taking a break from unpacking books and arranging them on the shelves built in to the study. 

"Harry, come look at what I found." 

Standing up, Harry set down the last plate after he unwrapped it from the paper, completing the stack on the counter. Then, he turned and followed Draco to the next room in the house that was now theirs. 

"What is it?" he asked, but Draco just kept walking. 

"You'll see," was all he said. 

They entered the study and Draco had all of their books covering the floor, but the shelves were empty. 

"Draco, what--"

"I said, you'll see, Saint Potter." 

Without another word, Draco walked over to the side of the shelf on the end. Placing a hand on the side, he pushed against the wall with his shoulder and the shelf opened up to reveal a passageway. 

Harry shook his head, smiling. "How do you have such a knack for this kind of thing?" 

Throwing a smile over his shoulder, Draco led the way into the passage. 

"Do you think it has the same curse as at the Manor? No Lumos?" 

"Well, I wouldn't want to find out," Draco bit back. 

"It's not like there can be so many of these passageways, Draco, the house isn't that big." 

Draco scoffed. "The passageways are magical, Potter. They don't correspond to how much physical space the house occupies. We're in magical space right now." 

"Then why did the Manor have crawl spaces?"

With a deep sigh, Harry could almost see Draco putting a hand to his head, despite the darkness. "Because that's just the way it was engineered. Would you shut up and let me show you?" 

"Show me what? I thought this was it?" 

They reached a turn and instead of continuing along the passageway, Draco pushed in front of them and the wall swung open into a wide room packed full of objects. 

He turned around, walking backward into the room with a smirk on his face. 

"Is this...?" 

Draco nodded. "We have a Forgotten Room. It's my theory all magical houses have them and most people just don't know how to find them." 

"Well, Hermione is doing her Unspeakable work on this kind of thing. Her theory is that a Forgotten Room acts as the memory storage and brain of the home. Maybe you should help her out. Find some of those rooms." 

Draco sighed contentedly, looking over the objects he was standing by. "I wonder what all of ours will show up in here. What mark we'll leave on the memory of this house."

"Well, with all the children we're planning on having, probably a lot." 

Draco laughed. "As long as we don't make any life-altering confessions in here, right?"

Pulling Draco close to him, Harry laughed as well. "Oh, please, Merlin, no. I don't want to have to go through that drama again." He kissed Draco and then glanced around the room. "Where do you think the rest of that corridor leads?"

Draco's eyes lit up and he took Harry's hand, leading them back that way. "I don't know. Let's go find out."

**Author's Note:**

> harry "im not gay but Charlie Weasley is Charlie Weasley" and "why do people think i like dudes???" potter
> 
> ___
> 
> i did NOT plan the forgotten room and when i made it i was like oh wow this is such a cool concept and then they started kissing and i was like oh my FUCK the ANGST that that has i mean,,like,,,oh NO talk about turning up the angst dial to fucking TWELVE on a ten scale.  
> ___
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!! Please feel free to leave a comment and/ or message me on [ tumblr ](https://www.shelvesuponshelves.tumblr.com)
> 
> I am also currently taking ficlet requests on [ tumblr ](https://www.shelvesuponshelves.tumblr.com)
> 
> Thank you for reading! Again, this is a series of Trashy Tropes for this ship: the next installment was supposed to be a holiday special but we are not currently near any fucking holiday, so you may just end up w a quarantine special!! (but we'll see i mean maybe by the time i get around to this we will be near a holiday) 
> 
> But in that same vein, if there is a particular holiday anyone may want to see, I could definitely take that into consideration, so hit up that comment button!


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